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Symphony of Illumination

‘Symphony of Illumination’

Season 7, Episode 12 -  Aired December 5, 2011

Robin asks Barney to keep the secret that she might be pregnant and he's the father. Meanwhile, Marshall tries to decorate the house for Christmas with the help of a neighbor kid.

Quote from Robin

Lily: Vaginal numbing spray. Apparently, after child birth, your hoo-ha looks like Rocky Balboa's face. [exits]
Barney: You can't have a baby!
Robin: I can't have a baby!

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Quote from Marshall

Scott: Hey, mister. Are you putting up all these Christmas lights?
Marshall: Oh, kid, by the time I'm done, you're gonna be able to see this sum'bitch from outer space.
Scott: Ah, cool. I wanted to put lights on our house, but my dad says he's too busy with work and stuff.
Marshall: Hey, what do you say, uh, you come back here next weekend and help me out?
Scott: Yeah! You've got yourself a deal. I'm Scott.
Marshall: I'm... Mr. Eriksen.
Scott: Thanks, Mr. E.
Marshall: [to himself] Mr. E. Looks like some little scamp just earned the right to put the Vikings helmet on baby Jesus.

Quote from Robin

Future Robin: [v.o.] Later that week, as I was enjoying every second of not being pregnant...
Announcer: [on TV] Next on Teenage Mommies...
Woman: [on TV] But you said you would watch Bella. I have cheerleading practice.
Robin: [laughs] Sucks to be you, Braces.

Quote from Marshall

Lily: [answers phone] Hey, baby, what's up?
Marshall: Hey, uh, listen, the construction of the Symphony of Illumination is taking a little longer than I thought. Good thing I have Scott here to help me. Right, Scott?
Scott: You betcha, Mr. E!
Lily: ad news. Robin's too tall to be an Olympic pole-vaulter.
Marshall: Has she filed an appeal with the IOC?
Lily: Have you filed an appeal with the IOC?
Marshall: Can she make herself shorter by slouching?
Lily: Can you make yourself shorter by slouching?
Marshall: Has she considered going back to school and competing at the collegiate level?
Lily: Have you considered going back to school and...
Robin: I don't want to talk about it.

Quote from Marshall

Marshall: Scott? Scott, I dropped my phone.
Scott: Yep, found it.
Marshall: Could you bring it up here?
Scott: You got it. Hey, while I'm at it, can I get you a beer?
Marshall: He wants to bring the old man a beer. Yeah, sure. Uh, there's a whole case in the fridge. Thanks, son. Do you, do you mind if I call you "son"?
Scott: You can call me whatever you want... jackass.
Marshall: Scott? The ladder fell. Scott?

Quote from Barney

Barney: Listen, um, I know things have been kind of weird between you and me these past couple weeks, so I just want to say I'm... I'm glad we're back to where we started.
Robin: Yeah.
Barney: Friends with benefits.
Robin: No.
Barney: Just like always.
Robin: Never been that. Just friends.
Barney: With benefits. We'll talk about it later.

Quote from Robin

Barney: Look at all these babies. Isn't it crazy how, now that we're not having one, babies are cute again? Look at that one.
Robin: I'm good.
Barney: No, I'm serious. Look, look.
Robin: Damn it. That thing's cute as crap. [whispering] Screw you, baby.

Quote from Marshall

Marshall: Scott? Scott! What is going on?
Scott: Hey, Mr. E.
Marshall: Scott, if you do not let me down, I am going to scream my head off until someone comes to help me, and then you're going to have to explain all of this to the cops.
Scott: And then you'll have to explain why there's a picture of my ding-dong on your phone.
Marshall: There is no picture of your...
Scott: There is now. Oh, yeah, that's a beauty.

Quote from Lily

Lily: Marshall keeps asking me to text him pictures of my boobies. After all these years, he sometimes still acts like a teenager.

Quote from Marshall

Marshall: Scott, when I get down from here, you are going to be in big, big trouble, mister.
Scott: Come on, Mr. E. Didn't you ever cut loose when you were a kid?
Marshall: That's irrelevant. I mean, of course I did. One time, when my parents were out of town, my brothers and I set the basement on fire hosting an amateur wrestling exhibition. There were some theatrics.
Scott: See, you get me. I don't think of you as some dummy I trapped on the roof. I think of you more like, like my dad. Can we keep the party going for 30 more minutes, please?
Marshall: Okay, Scott.
Scott: Thanks, Pop.
Marshall: It's fine, kid just needed to blow off some steam. [watches Scott "dancing" with the blanket] No! Grandma Gunderson knitted that! Scott!

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