Future Ted Quote #130
Quote from Future Ted in Last Cigarette Ever
Ted: Hey, guys, look, the sun's coming up.
Robin: You know what right now is a perfect time for? A last cigarette ever. No, I mean, a real last cigarette ever.
Barney: Damn it, let's do it.
Ted: Okay.
Marshall: All right. Last cigarette ever on the count of three.
Ted: One...
Lily: [raspy voice] ...two...
Robin: ...three.
Future Ted: [v.o.] We all quit for a while after that, but it wasn't anyone's last cigarette. We did eventually all quit smoking for real. Robin's last cigarette was in June, 2013. Barney's last cigarette was in March, 2017. Lily's last cigarette was the day she started trying to get pregnant. And Marshall's last cigarette was the day his son was born. And my last cigarette? Two weeks into dating your mother. And I never looked back.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Last Cigarette Ever’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Robin: Look at you two. Smokers. Just like the rest of us.
Barney: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I am not a smoker. I only smoke in certain situations: Post-coital, when I'm with Germans. Sometimes those two overlap. Coital, birthdays, to annoy my mom, pre-coital, on a sailboat, the day the Mets are mathematically eliminated every year, and, of course, wait for it, 'cause Lord knows I have, pregnancy scares.
Ted: Why are you smoking right now?
Barney: I'm always pre-coital, Ted.
Quote from Lily
Ted: Okay, that's it. Let's quit.
Marshall: Let's. Let's do it.
Barney: Well, I am proud of you guys. I have heard how difficult it is for smokers, like yourself, to quit, so, on behalf of non-smokers, I salute you, and I am here to help. So, hand in your cigarettes, and I will get rid of them, one at a time.
Lily: [raspy voice] You're quitting, dollface. I know I don't normally call you "dollface," but it kind of works in this voice. Dollface.
Quote from Ted
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, back in 2009, your Aunt Robin was the host of a morning show for local New York cable. And it was on pretty early. How early?
[On the TV show, the camera pans down as a man is heard snoring]
ROBIN: Mike? Wake up.
Future Ted: But then, everything changed.
Ted: Hey.
Robin: Hey. See my show?
Ted: Aw, I meant to watch it. I just got so busy with the whole being-sound-asleep thing. It took all night, eight hours down the drain.