Ted: Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Okay, okay, just be cool. We're just gonna have to deal with this. Everyone, follow my lead. [hides under the table]
Marshall: Oh, you're kidding.
Lily: Is he serious?
Barney: I am not getting under this table. I'd maybe get under that table.
Robin: She's turning around.
[Everyone ducks under the table]

Marshall: She's placing an order to go.
Ted: Did she seem happy? Did she say anything about me? I don't care. I don't even care. Where are those almonds?
Barney: Gosh, where would Ted's nuts be? Hey, why don't you check the vise in Stella's garage?

Marshall: Go yell at her.
Lily: Ted, you may be from Ohio, but you live in New York now. We don't push down our feelings in New York. We take our feelings and we shove them in somebody else's face!

Barney: Oh, Lily, we've all been there. When you've ripped one, it's not pretty.

Robin: What did you do?
Lily: Are you kidding? This was ninth grade. I only had one choice.
[flashback to Lily in high school:]
Lily: Oh, my God, Sasser. Fart much?
Sasser: No, it wasn't me. It was her.
Lily: Oh! As if, Sasser. More like Gasser. Gasser! Gasser! Gasser!
All: Gasser! Gasser! Gasser!
Sasser: No. I'm on the baseball team. I'm cool.
[present:]
Lily: The nickname Gasser stuck. He got teased so much, eventually he had to change schools.

Barney: Ted, I am a person who... Well, let's just face it. There are a lot of people I don't want to see. People of the "chicks I banged" persuasion. But if any of them were to walk in here, I would stand up and I would look them right in the eye. Some of them for the very first time.

Ted: Really, you wouldn't hide from anyone?
Barney: Uh-uh.
Ted: Not even, say, Becca DeLucci?
Barney: You son of a bitch.
Waiter: Who's Becca DeLucci?
Barney: Do you mind?

Ted: There, all done, and that's how we do it Ohio-style. Problem showed up. We avoided it. It went away. Now we can enjoy our meal in peace...
Marshall: She's back.
[They all duck under the table again]

Future Ted: [v.o.] And then I realized... All of my friends were haunted, but there was a difference between my ghost and theirs. It wasn't too late for me.
Ted: I'm gonna go talk to her.

Marshall: What are you going to say?
Ted: I'm gonna say, "Stella, I'm sorry things didn't work out. "
All: No!
Ted: Yes. We're going to talk about this like adults. She can tell me her side and I'm going to listen. Probably should have done a little more of that before.
Barney: Driver, can you run us into the nearest lamppost? Everyone, buckle up. Not you, Ted.