‘Too Many Cooks’
Season 3, Episode 19 - Aired March 16, 1994
Tim struggles to be Al's assistant when they are asked to host Cooking with Irma for a week.
Quote from Randy
Randy: Oh, man. I am such a dork. [throws snowball at Wilson's house]
Wilson: Experiencing some adolescent angst, preteen Taylor?
Randy: Oh... Sorry, Wilson.
Wilson: Mm-hmm.
Randy: I just made a jerk of myself in front of a girl.
Wilson: Well, Randy Taylor, welcome to the tribe of men.
Randy: I mean, I don't get it. I really like Beth, but ever since she got here, I've been saying really dumb things.
Wilson: Well, Randy, probably that's because you're sailing in unfamiliar waters. I'm sure the first time Romeo met a girl, he probably said some dumb things, too. [looks over the fence] Hello?
Randy: [waves] Right here. Did Romeo ask Juliet if she wanted a "booger cookie"?
Wilson: Mm... mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm, mmm. Now, that is a gaffe and a half. [chuckles]
Quote from Al
Al: All right, well, Tim, you wanna double check to see if I've preheated our oven to 350 degrees?
Tim: OK. I also read that you shouldn't overstuff your duck 'cause it gets in there...
Al: Tim, I've been doing this for years, I think I know what I'm doing.
Tim: I'm just saying...
Al: That's fine.
Tim: 350 on the dot. We've also moved our rack to the top level so that bird will come out nice and crispy. Voilà. OK, we're all ready for the duck.
Al: OK. [Al struggles to get his hand out of the duck]
Tim: Get it before the heat goes out.
Al: Yeah. I just... I, um... Just making sure that that is stuffed in there.
Tim: You want me to give you a hand?
Al: Uh, I think I know what I'm doing, Tim. [As Al pulls his hand out, the duck goes flying through the window]
Tim: What Al's done here is actually develop a new recipe. You've heard of pheasant under glass. This would be quacker through the glass.
Quote from Tim
Tim: Al, I made the car alarm a little less sensitive. Now only big flies set it off.
Quote from Al
Al: Ooh, boy! Do I detect a hint of tarragon and a soupçon of oregano?
Irma: Oh, very good, Al.
Al: Well, I use that in my own ratatouille.
Tim: Oh, you gals have so much in common.
Quote from Mark
Jill: How was school?
Mark: Great. We got our class pictures back.
Jill: Oh, good. Let me see. Where are you?
Mark: Third one from the right.
Jill: You're a little Asian girl?
Mark: Oh, I meant the left.
Jill: Oh, you look so cute!
Mark: Thanks, Mommy.
Quote from Tim
Tim: [as Julia Child] Well, I'm ready for my cooking debut. Al, something smells wonderful back here. Goodness, it's me!
Quote from Tim
Randy: I can't believe Beth's coming here. What if I don't have anything to say to her?
Tim: Just sit there and talk about yourself the whole time. Women love that.
Jill: I'm surprised you didn't tell him to burp for Beth.
Tim: You gotta save something for the second date.
Quote from Jill
Jill: Beth, um, I think I met your parents at Back-to-School night. Your mother is the, um...
Beth: Aerobics instructor.
Jill: Oh... yeah. I remember her. [eats sugar cookie]
Beth: These are really great sugar cookies. My mom doesn't keep sweets in our house. She says they make you fat.
Jill: [stops eating] Well, if you guys need me... I'll be upstairs doing stomach crunches.
Quote from Tim
Al: As we all know, the French are the masters of the kitchen. Nothing says "bonjour" better than duck. Now, the first thing I'm going to be needing here is a large roasting pan. Where did I...?
Tim: It's over here.
Al: Uh, thank you. I didn't think you were joining me in the kitchen today.
Tim: Well, I'm your assistant. Where else would I be?
Al: Well, great. Thank you.
Quote from Tim
Jill: Well, Tim, I'm very impressed. You see what a great second banana you were?
Tim: Yeah, it would have been a tragedy had that second banana split.