Wilson: Tim, why are you so interested in Al and Heidi's personal life?
Tim: I don't know. I've never cared about Al's personal life before. And I've even never asked Heidi about hers. But you put the two of them together... There's that image again.
Wilson: Tim, have you ever heard of the term "cognitive dissonance?"
Tim: You know I'm not into politics.
Wilson: Cognitive dissonance is when pieces of our lives no longer make sense. Beliefs we always held true seem to be false so we have to reorder our way of thinking.
Tim: [chuckles] Are you saying a Rambler could hook bumpers with a Ferrari?
Wilson: It's very possible.

Al: Uh, Heidi... Uh, can I just talk to you about one thing?
Heidi: Sure. What?
Al: Well, after that night you stayed at my house, Tim got this crazy idea that, that you and I might have... How do I say this?
Heidi: Slept together.
Al: Yeah. OK. Yeah, that's it. And he just thought that was impossible because he doesn't think a beautiful woman like you could ever be interested in, in a guy like me.
Heidi: Oh, is that so? Well, let me tell you something, Al. If I weren't married, you're exactly the type of guy I'd be looking for.
Al: Thank you. I wish, I wish Tim could hear you say that.
Heidi: You know, I don't think Tim really needs to hear anything. [kisses Al]

Al: You know, it's a lot of fun. Why don't you join me for a drink?
Tim: I'd like to. You know how I love fresh pupu. But Jill's got the flu and I'm stopping by the pharmacy to pick up medication. Anything you suggest?
Al: Well, these days I'm strictly homeopathic.
Tim: Well, no wonder you're not meeting any women.

Tim: Where are you going in that shirt?
Al: Well, it's happy hour at The Tiki Hut. And you gotta get there by five o'clock, otherwise the pupu platter is picked clean.
Tim: Do you actually meet women there? Or just go there to pig out on pupu?
Al: Well, I haven't met anyone yet. But I'm forming a social network of people with similar interests.
Tim: People who eat their dinner off toothpicks in the middle of the afternoon.

Tim: We can't leave Heidi alone when she's this upset. Take her to the Tiki Hut.
Al: Well, nothing raises one's spirits like a fistful of pot stickers.

Randy: Here you go, Mom.
Jill: Oh, thank you, sweetie.
Randy: What are you doing with all these mail-order catalogs?
Jill: Well, now that I'm sick, I finally have time to look through them. You gotta see this. "The World's Best Earwax Removal System".
Randy: Cool. And if you act now, they'll toss in "The World's Best Bunion Scraper".

Brad: All right, off we go.
Mark: Yeah. We're going to the mall to pick up some CD's.
[Jill blows her nose]
Randy: You know what? I'll go with you.
Jill: Hey, guys. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You don't have to go anywhere. I've got a music catalog that'll save you money. Look at this. Fifteen CD's for a penny.
Brad: Well, it sounds great. But who's Pat Boone?

Tim: I thought you needed time off.
Heidi: I did, too. But then I had dinner with Al. He put everything in perspective.
Tim: Well, are you and Scott getting back together?
Heidi: I don't know. But I've made it over this first hurdle. Al really helped me get in touch with my rage.
Tim: Hm. No one brings out rage better than Al.

Tim: Well, I don't know what you talked about with Heidi. But it did a lot of good. Well done.
Al: Well, last night was pretty incredible for me, too, you know. We talked about everything from the weather to the most intimate details of her life.
Tim: Forget the weather. How about the other stuff?
Al: Well, basically, you know, after Amy was born, Heidi didn't feel very sexual. Scott was not understanding and that turned Heidi off to sex even more.
Tim: So they're not uh...
Al: No. No. Not for a while. Huh. But before the baby, Oh, my God!
Tim: What? What?
Al: Well, I've already said too much. I don't want to betray Heidi's confidence.
Tim: I can respect that.
Al: OK.
Tim: Now, I could guess some things. If I'm real close, you could just nod.

Jill: Is something wrong?
Tim: Heidi just answered the phone at Al's house at 7:30 in the morning. She must've spent the night there. Now I feel sick.