Lorelai: So, I am holding in my hand one of our comment cards on which a particular person has written, and I quote, "Best meal I've ever had. The duck was exceptional, the lamb chops were amazing. Ask the chef if he'll marry me." What do you think?
Luke: I don't know, what does she look like?
Lorelai: I didn't say it was a she.
Luke: I'll stick with what I have.

Luke: I knew it! Are you insane?
Sookie: Well, you wouldn't take my calls.
Luke: How long have you been up here?
Sookie: Since you made me promise that no food would leave the premises. Well, here I am, keeping my promises. Pedro, give me the ladle.
Luke: Pedro, do not give her that ladle.
Sookie: Give me the ladle, Pedro.
Luke: Vente uno con migo, Pedro!
Sookie: Hueso su jefe, Pedro!
Luke: You're scaring Pedro.
Sookie: You're scaring Pedro.

Luke: All day long things are disappearing. Salads are suddenly gone. Lamb chops don't make it to the table.
Sookie: I had to make sure you were doing it right.
Luke: You're supposed to be home.
Sookie: No, I'm supposed to be in bed. And I am in bed. And you said that you would double-strain the duck sauce and you, my friend, are not double straining.
Luke: There will be no more of this. No more calls. No more questions. No more ladles that leave that kitchen. I don't care what bed you're in. That is between you and your husband and - God, I hope - a qualified therapist. But you will not Interfere with me anymore. Period.

Jackson: Hey, you in the hat.
Luke: Jackson, what are you-
Jackson: How dare you take a ladle from a pregnant woman.
Luke: What?
Jackson: Dr. Menck very specifically said that she needs to relax and she cannot relax thinking you're in here screwing up her sauce.
Luke: I'm not.
Jackson: Now, while there's a very good chance that you could kill me in a fight, I do not care. That woman is my wife, and she is carrying my baby. So from now on, if she wants to talk, you will talk. If she wants to taste your food, you will let her taste your food. If she wants you to double-strain that sauce, you will double-strain that sauce, my friend. Because I have to live with her and if she is upset because of anything that you have done, I will come over here and I will soundly kick your ass. That is if you haven't killed me yet.
Luke: Hey.

Lorelai: Ah, if this is the eccentric couple version of the Amazing Race, I think you guys are winning.

Lorelai: Does it seem like Frodo is on every fricking channel to you, or is it just me?l

Rory: I don't understand.
Logan: They're psychotic. What more is there to understand?
Rory: But why don't they think I'm good enough?
Logan: Rory.
Rory: I mean, I'm a Gilmore. Do they know that? My ancestors came over on the Mayflower.
Logan: Don't try to analyze it, there's no rhyme or reason.
Rory: I had a coming out party. I went to Chilton, and Yale. And why are they okay with Josh? I mean, he doesn't even say anything. At least I noticed the Velazquez.