Frasier: But, rules are there for reason. I was obviously at fault for not getting approval before I hung it up there.
Niles: I did notice a sign in the lobby about some condo board meeting tonight if you want to present your case.
Frasier: Oh, perfect. We live in a democratic system and I will work within it. I'm sure I can persuade them with my charm and eloquence.
Daphne: I don't know, those people can be very difficult.
Frasier: Oh, pish-tosh! It's not as though I'll be addressing the Supreme Court, I'll simply be talking to the board!
Martin: Well, they will be by the time he gets through.

Man: What's important is that you were not afraid to go up against Ms. Langer last night.
Frasier: Without much success.
Man: More than you know. Those people in the building are afraid of her. There is a group of us who fight her though, a small-but-determined band of resistors. You know the doormat by the service elevator? We did that.
Frasier: It's very nice.

Man: You are our only chance, Dr. Crane, and she must be defeated. She is evil! Nichols, in 1704, was two days late with his condo fee and she lowered the water pressure in his shower. Eventually, he died.
Frasier: From bad water pressure?
Man: No, I think it was a hunting accident. But he spent his last months on this earth unable to get all the conditioner out of his hair.

Frasier: All right, but why can't I see who you are?
Man: Because I'm remodeling my bathroom. If she found out I was talking to you, she would never approve my bidet. Just think of me as "Mr. X"!
[Mr. X gets in his car and drives away]
Frasier: That would work better without the vanity plates, Dr. Dorfman!

Frasier: Oh, Niles, you simply have to diffuse the entire subject with simple, adult conversation. I don't want to re-create what happened to Maris and me after the cabin incident when I walked in on her taking a shower. Oh God, months of avoidance and awkwardness.
Niles: Excuse me? You saw my Maris completely naked?
Frasier: Oh, don't fret, Niles, it was really nothing more than a fleeting glance in a very steamy bathroom. More like glimpsing a bird sapling through a thick fog.
Niles: Life is so unfair! You get a vision of my Maris, I get a big eyeful of Dad!
Frasier: Well, I'd say we hit about the same level on the "Yikes!" meter!

Frasier: Roz, the most extraordinary thing happened. I was down at the parking garage. Suddenly, I was blinded by a set of headlights. A mysterious man crept from the shadows and told me I should run for condo board president.
Roz: You've been at your wine club, haven't you?!

Daphne: I've had to lug these things five blocks. This morning, Mrs. Langer gave me one of those no-no slips for
parking in the same vacant space I've been using for years.
Frasier: God, I'm sorry, Daphne, I'm afraid this is my fault. Ms. Langer's simply retaliating against me. You see, last night I rather humiliated her in a dazzling display of rhetoric.
Daphne: I heard you spilled your briefcase all over the floor.
Frasier: You know, this building has a grapevine Ernest & Julio Gallo would envy!

Frasier: You know, perhaps I should run against Ms. Langer. God knows, she's ripe for a good comeuppance!
Daphne: Oh, I know exactly what you mean, Dr. Crane. I was standing behind her in the elevator the other day, looking at the back of her head and I thought, "You know, several stout whacks with a tire iron and this building would be a much happier place." I'll just get these bags off to the kitchen.

Daphne: "Dear Dr. Crane, we have polled the building. The election is yours, good work. Signed, Anonymous." But wouldn't this be more anonymous if it didn't say, "from the desk of Dr. William M. Dorfman"?
Frasier: Yes, well, now you see why they need me.

Frasier: I think Ms. Langer may have given me the very ammunition I need for my opening salvo. We'll just see how the voters feel about a woman who tries to persecute a disabled ex-policeman and his loyal old dog.
Daphne: You know, it will be nice to live a building where anyone can hang whatever they damn well please on their door.
Frasier: Of course. Well, pending my approval.