Frasier: But my job is to suspect everybody. Please, introduce me to your... No, no, never mind. I know your guests by reputation. This must be Mr. Wing, the silk merchant. Did you witness anything suspicious, Wing? [Bulldog is frozen with fear] Of course, the inscrutable and mute Mr. Wing, who ... wears a bell on his hat. Did you witness anything suspicious, Wing? [Frasier shakes bell] No, eh? I'll remember you said that.

Frasier: At the movies you say, well one quick phone call can verify that. What's this? Dear God, the phone lines have been cut. [organ music] Oh, we were really stranded. Totally and completely isolated from any contact with the outside world. [The studio phone rings. Noel answers it.] The phone lines have been repaired, you say? Hello? Wait, they've gone dead again.

Frasier: Gil! At the bottom of page fourteen, listen, after you're shot just say "I'm dying," cut the rest.
Gil: That's my boyhood in Surrey speech.
Frasier: Yes, I know.
Gil: You can't cut that, you can't.
Frasier: Stop whining. We've got a play to do.
Gil: I don't care anymore.

Martin: Boy, I sure didn't see that one coming!
Gil: [radio:] Hello, I'm the ice cream man. Years ago I went to school with Nigel Fairservice. We used to romp in the fens and spinneys... [gun shot]
Daphne: This is turning into a blood bath.
Martin: See, that's why I prefer TV. You want to be able to see that stuff!