Leland: This sherry is exquisite.
Frasier: Oh, thank you. It's an Andalusian Amontillado I'm rather fond of.
Leland: A connoisseur. I'm very surprised. Most Americans think that sherry is just for cooking.
Frasier: Oh, my brother and I have always had a taste for it.
Martin: Well, you didn't get any of that from me. I always hated the stuff. You know, come to think of it, so did your mom.

Niles: Okay, we just need to fill in a name and I can get the application over to St. Osric's.
Daphne: How can we have a name? I'm not even pregnant yet.
Niles: Well, it's not the name, it's just a place holder. Anything will do.
Daphne: All right, how about, uh... Simon?
Niles: As in your brother with the substance abuse problem, Simon?
Daphne: There are other Simons, you know. Simon Templar, Simon Legree... Simon Chipmunk.
Niles: Not exactly building a case for "Simon".
Niles: How about Jill?
Daphne: No, don't like it. That's the name of that weather tart on channel eight.

Niles: All right, let's just pick a name at random. Like out of the phone book.
Daphne: That's a good idea. Leave it to fate.
Niles: Okay. When I stop, you point.
Daphne: "Bob."
Niles: Great. Bob Crane. Okay, we're going to need some Wite-Out.

Frasier: Dad, Roz, any chance you'd like to take in some Parisian photos taken by an old Romanian master?
Martin: Hmm... no.

Niles: [on the phone with Daphne] No. That's a kind of car.

Niles: [on the phone with Daphne] Now it just sounds like you're reading from the spice rack.

Leland: "I realized the sherpa had become my guide in more ways than one."
Frasier: Oh, that was wonderful. Read me another.
Leland: No, no. Go to sleep now.

Roz: Hey, what is the worst case scenario? If you found out you weren't their father, would you love them any less?
Martin: No, no. Well, yeah, a little maybe, at first. But no, I... I'd feel the same about them as I hope they would about me.
Roz: Which they would. And you know that.

Niles: Well then, tell you what. You pick a name and I'll accept it unconditionally.
Daphne: "Milton".
Niles: "Milton." Great poet and a great name.
Daphne: Great. Can we go to bed now?
Niles: Yes.
Niles: Hey, didn't you have a soccer hooligan boyfriend named Milton?
Daphne: Yeah. That's where I got it.
[Niles runs back to rub the name "Milton" out]

Leland: What a wonderfully musical family you are.
Martin: We sure are. Me and my boys. My boys and me. Yeah, we're wonderful and we're musical.
Leland: Martin, I can't tell you what a wonderful job you've done with them.
Martin: Oh, it wasn't a job, it was a biological pleasure! And don't forget I had Hester.