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Traffic School

‘Traffic School’

Season 2, Episode 21 -  Aired April 20, 1998

When Robert practices his traffic school lesson on his family, he introduces a ventriloquist dummy, Traffic Cop Timmy, who voices some of Robert's lingering resentments.

Quote from Ray

Robert: Now, I would like to direct your attention to the board. You will see: "Speed limits", "Pedestrians, signs and signals of the highway"
Ray: Things that are boring!
Robert: "Urban vs. rural driving"
Ray: Things I don't care about!
Robert: "Insurance."
Ray: Terribly boring things!

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Quote from Frank

Marie: Shut up, Frank.
Frank: What?
Marie: Yeah, you were about to do a bathroom joke.
Frank: A bathroom joke?
Marie: Yeah, about binding.
Robert: All right, look, let's focus, people.
Frank: [laughs] Rice.
Robert: Look, please-
Frank: Cheese.
Robert: That's enough! How about some...
Frank: Bananas!
Ray: Things that are binding.

Quote from Ray

Robert: I'm not signing your thing, Dad.
Ray: It's me.
Robert: I'm not signing your thing, either.
Ray: That's all right. Listen. I'm sorry about the- You know, telling you to lighten up and everything.
Robert: It's all right. Gave it a shot.
Ray: Yeah, it went well. Boy, hat Timmy's got a lot of issues, though.
Robert: You know, Timmy's just a puppet.
Ray: Yeah, I know. It's good to hear you say it.

Quote from Ray

Robert: Nightmares, huh?
Ray: Yeah.
Robert: How long did you have them?
Ray: I just had one four days ago.
Robert: That is pretty messed up.
Ray: Yeah, it is. So the jumping-canoe guy is.
Robert: Dad.
Ray: Oh, my God.

Quote from Robert

Robert: Thanks for coming over, Raymond. You really did make me feel better.
Ray: Man, they're worse than I thought. I should talk to them.
Robert: Want to borrow the dummy?

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