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‘She's the One’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Everybody Loves Raymond: She's the One

709. She's the One

Aired November 18, 2002

When  Robert invites a woman to dinner who he believes may finally be "the one", Ray sees her doing something unusual.

Quote from Marie

Robert: This again?!
Marie: A woman ate a fly? Nobody believes your stories, Robbie. Just say it.
Robert: No!
Marie: "I'm a gay."
Robert: What?
Marie: You'll feel better. "Hello, I'm queer, and now I'm here!"
Ray: Who says that?
Marie: That's the slogan. Just admit it already!

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Quote from Ray

Debra: Listen, Robert, just relax. If Angela really is the one, she's gonna have to meet your parents at some point. You might as well get it over with. Right, Ray?
Ray: [turns around] She's not the one.
Robert: What?
Ray: Come here. Listen. Listen. I saw something that I have to tell you, because you have to know, because I saw it.
Robert: What are you talking about?
Debra: What did you see, Ray?
Ray: Angela ate the fly.
Debra: What?!
Robert: What do you mean?
Ray: The fly that was flying around, Angela killed it, it fell on the table, she put it in a napkin, and then she ate it!

Quote from Marie

Debra: Come on, Robert, she does not.
Ray: Oh, what is it about you that you don't believe me when I tell you? She sat right there at your dinner table and ate a fly!
Marie: I could believe that.
Ray: No, Mom, it wasn't in the food.
Marie: Oh. I don't believe that.

Quote from Robert

Angela: Robert?
Robert: Oh! Hello!
Angela: What are you doing?
Robert: I'm seeing if it's still raining.
Angela: You're going out the window.
Robert: What? Oh, no, no, no, no. Yes. Yes, I-I-I am. But just- just for a second because my car has my poncho in it. So... I'm gonna run and get my trusty poncho, and then I'm gonna go get some ice cream for us. Ya like ice cream? I do. I like it with chocolate chips or nuts and sprinkles... And actually, somebody told me that you might prefer a different topping.
Angela: You know, Robert, we all come from frogs.
Robert: Ah. Interesting. Good night.

Quote from Frank

Robert: Yeah, yeah, you know what? Laugh all you want, 'cause I'm done.
Debra: What do you mean you're done?
Robert: Done. I'm done dating. I'm done trying to meet someone. I'm done with humiliation. I can't anymore.
Frank: There's nothing humiliating about going out the window. If your mother's apartment had been one floor lower, we wouldn't be having this conversation.

Quote from Robert

Ray: Ma, I saw that girl eat a fly!
Marie: Stop it, Raymond! Why can't you just accept that your brother is different? I accept you, Robbie.
Robert: Listen, Ma, I would love nothing more than to tell you I'm gay.
Frank: Marie, look what you're doing!
Robert: But I'm not, Dad, all right? So you can unclench your intestines. I wish I had a good reason why I'm always striking out. But I don't. It's me. It's me. Most people find their other half. And I just have to wake up and accept already that maybe there is no other half... for this.
Marie: Oh, Robbie!
Robert: See you later.

Quote from Marie

Marie: Robbie, honey, I know what you're going through, and I can help you. I just want you, once and for all, to say it to me.
Robert: What are you talking about? Say what to you?
Marie: That you're homosexual.
Robert: Ma!
Marie: Just say it!
Frank: No, don't say it!
Robert: I'm not saying it!

Quote from Frank

Robert: No! Would you stop?!
Marie: Well, then, what is it? Because I can't take it anymore. You're torturing me, do you know that? You are into your 40s, and still you can't settle down. I stay up nights tossing and turning in my bed because I'm so sick about it. I just want you to be with someone, anyone, I don't care who it is. I mean, for God's sakes, do you want to die alone?
Frank: Yes! Oh, him.

Quote from Robert

Robert: Well, you can believe it, Ma. It's the story of my life I finally meet a girl who has absolutely everything I ever wanted, she's the Frog Woman of Massapequa.
Debra: I thought you said it was flies.
Robert: She keeps frogs, thousands of frogs all over her apartment, and she feeds them flies, I guess... I dunno. She's a freakin' sideshow. What do you want from me?

Quote from Ray

Debra: What the hell are you doing, Ray?!
Robert: Yeah, man, what is your problem?
Ray: I'm telling you, I saw that woman eat a fly!
Debra: Oh, she did not! You must have seen something else.
Ray: Oh, what, then?! What did I see?
Debra: I don't know. Maybe it was a crouton or something.
Ray: A flying crouton?!

Quote from Robert

Marie: What about Angela, Robbie? She seemed so genuine and so refined. We have so much in common.
Robert: Forget it, Ma. It's not gonna happen.
Marie: Oh, no! What did you do?
Ray: What happened, Robert? Did she eat another one?
Marie: What? Eat another what?
Robert: You don't wanna know, Ma.
Marie: You tell me right this minute, young man.
Robert: All right, Ma, fine. She eats bugs.
Frank: Come again?

Quote from Robert

Debra: So how many dates have you been on?
Robert: Well, tonight was the third one, and I know it's kinda early, but I'm getting this feeling. I don't know... I think she might be...
Debra: What do you mean? The one? Are you saying that you think Angela might be the one?
Ray: All right, whoa. Let's not jump the gun, okay? I mean, don't forget, he married one that wasn't the one.
Debra: So when are we gonna meet her?
Robert: Well, listen, I would love that, but I'm a little afraid about bringin' her over here 'cause, you know, Mom and Dad will pop by, and I kinda don't want her to meet them until... ever.

Quote from Robert

Marie: Hello.
Angela: Hi.
Marie: Hi. I'm Marie. Are you a single friend of Robert's?
Robert: Yes, yes. Angela, these are Ray and Debra's neighbors. Mom and Dad.

Quote from Robert

Robert: Actually, he's always been a little jealous of me.
Angela: Who wouldn't be?
Robert: And it's always bothered him that our mother prefers me.
Angela: Who wouldn't prefer you?
Robert: I really like you.
Angela: I really like you.
Robert: You know, he once sold my bicycle to another kid.
Angela: Robert?
Robert: Yes?
Angela: Could we kiss now?

Quote from Robert

Marie: Oh, Robbie!
Robert: Hello.
Debra: Oh, look at you.
Ray: What, is it rainin'?
Robert: No, Raymond. I'm a pearl diver.

Quote from Ray

Marie: I don't believe a word of that, Robbie. She had such nice shoes.
Robert: I had to go out the window.
Ray: Did she try to stop you with her tongue?
Robert: It's not funny, Raymond. [Frank laughs]

Quote from Ray

Ray: No, no, no! You bring her over to meet Mom and Dad right away! You gotta get it over with quick. It's like rippin' off a Band-Aid. Yeah, you let her know what she's in for, and if she doesn't run away screamin', then you know you got a keeper. Huh? Am I right, sqeeze-ioli?
Debra: Go away.

Quote from Frank

Marie: I don't wanna hear it anymore.
Robert: Hello.
Debra: Hey, what are you two doin' back so soon?
Marie: Your father made a scene, and we were escorted out of the casino.
Frank: Two buckets of nickels, and not one payout.
Marie: That's no reason to throw a roast beef sandwich at the machine!

Quote from Marie

Marie: How nice to meet you.
Angela: You too.
Marie: Oh, I see you were having a little get-together. If I had known, I would have never gone to Atlantic City. Why didn't you tell me, Raymond? [Ray is still too stunned to speak]

Quote from Ray

Debra: Are you drunk?
Ray: Look, I'm trying to help him!
Robert: How is this supposed to help me, Raymond?
Ray: I'm doing what any brother would do. If you see Debra eat a fly, I want you to tell me right away!
Debra: She did not eat a fly.
Ray: Yes, she-
Debra: No, she-
Ray: Yeeeeeees!

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