Ray: Hi.
Marie: Hello, Ray. You hungry?
Ray: No, I just ate.
Marie: [sniffs Ray] No. Don't lie to me. Sit down.

Ray: What are you guys doing Saturday?
Frank: Here, Jell-O for the kids. Save 30 cents.
Ray: Oh, thanks, Dad. Now I can buy that boat.
Marie: What's Saturday, dear?
Ray: Debra's parents.
Frank & Marie: Not Howie and Eva.
Ray: Warren and Lois, Dad. You're not even close. Why don't you see if they got a coupon in there for shock treatments?

Ray: Come on, you know how Debra is with this family thing. I know, it's insane. Please, look, I promise it'll all be over before Warren can say: "I bought another sculpture." [Frank and Marie laugh]
Marie: He's such an ass.
Frank: What about Lois: "I prefer dark chocolate."
Ray: Good, so you'll come. You can find new things to make fun of them. It's for Debra, really.

Lois: Where are the kids?
Ray: Jail.
Debra: It's naptime.

Debra: What are you guys doing?
Ray: Nothing. We're stomping.
Debra: You're making fun of my parents.
Ray: No, no. All right, we're making a little fun of them. Vietnam? It comes from love.

Lois: Doesn't this sound like fun? Oh, come on, you guys, our treat. It would mean so much to us.
Marie: But we're just so very busy.
Debra: Ray.
Ray: Well, we're not too busy for our in-laws. Yes, Le Bernardus. The whole family. Together.
Warren: Great.
Marie: Oh, it's gonna be so thrilling.
Frank: It'll be more fun than Vietnam.

Maitre'd: Bonsoir, welcome to Le Bernardus.
Frank: Holy crap!
Debra: We're with the Whalen party.
Maitre'd: Yes, your hosts have arrived already. I'll be glad to take you to your table.
Frank: Am I going to have to tip this guy?
Marie: No, we'll seat ourselves. Thank you. Come on, let's go.

Debra: Ray, what's with your parents? It's like the first time they've worn shoes.

Debra: See, Marie... every once in a while, my family just likes to try and enjoy life.
Marie: Well, I guess we just don't understand.
Warren: Well, not everyone can understand everything.
Frank: What's that supposed to mean?
Ray: It's all right, Dad, it's okay.
Frank: You're taking their side now?
Robert: Is anyone else hot and cold?

Frank: Don't you have to go to your house?
Ray: I can't. I took your side. I may have to wait until the Red Cross tells me it's safe to go back. Boy, they were pretty mad!
Marie: You know what? Who could blame them?
Ray: What?
Marie: Well, I was mortified, the way you behaved tonight.
Ray: Me?
Frank: You blew the whole evening. Where did you learn your manners?
Ray: What are you talking about?
Robert: Great dinner, Raymond. I think I'll go to my room and chew on some jerky.