Chris Quote #612
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates Lasagna
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Before Cops was a show on TV, I saw cops chasing criminals every day on the streets in Bed-Stuy. Some of the criminals were fast. Some of them were fast, then slow. And no matter what you saw, the most important thing was to not get involved.
T.J.: Hold this.
Chris: What is it?
T.J.: What you think it is? And you better have it when I get back!
Police Officer: Hey, where's the weed, T.J.?
T.J.: I ain't got no weed, man!
Police Officer: Yeah, right. Where's the weed, T.J.?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I had never actually seen real marijuana. But after having a bag of it shoved into my hands, I knew one thing: If that's what happened to the guy who didn't have the weed, I didn't want to know what would happen to the guy who did have it.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Lasagna’ Quotes
Quote from Ms. Morello
Ms. Morello: Chris, come on! You might be Black, but you're not fireproof. Leave that bag there.
Quote from Adult Chris
Adult Chris: [v.o.] A bag of weed can cause you all kinds of problems: big ones, like losing your job; and little ones, like trying to figure out where to hide it. I thought about hiding it in the bathroom.
[fantasy:]
Julius: Who's hiding $27 worth of weed in the toilet?!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I thought about hiding it in my room.
Tonya: Mama! Somebody hid some weed in Chris' sock drawer!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I even thought about hiding it in the kitchen.
Rochelle: Who hid weed in my cereal?!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] But I decided the safest place to hide it was on me.
Quote from Ms. Morello
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Now I had two problems. The guy's weed was in a lasagna. And I had a lasagna full of weed.
Ms. Morello: Ooh, that looks delicious! I would've thought you would fry up some chicken, but this is a real surprise.