Chris Quote #372
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates Minimum Wage
Mr. Fong: Lionel Richie, you're back just in time for another delivery.
Chris: I'm not going back out there. This neighborhood is too dangerous for deliveries. You're basically sending me out there with a sign saying, "Hey, I got money. Please rob me." Plus, I almost got shot.
Mr. Fong: My nephew has been shot by the Chinese army seven times.
Man: [Chinese: In the face!]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He should stop attacking China.
Mr. Fong: Here's your check. Maybe it help you feel better.
Chris: $48.29? Where's the rest of the money?
Mr. Fong: Taxes. The law says I have to take out withholding. Welcome to America. Now take this to Decatur Street.
Chris: Uh-uh. You take it. 'Cause I quit. And I don't look like Lionel Richie.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Yes, I do!
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Minimum Wage’ Quotes
Quote from Chris
Julius: You can't just quit every time you don't like something. I mean, what if Miles Davis had quit the trumpet?
Chris: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. What if George Washington Carver quit the peanut? What if B.B. King quit "Lucille"? What if Paul Robeson quit "Old Man River"? [time lapse] What if Bill Cosby quit Jell-O? What if Mr. T quit pitying the fool? What if Stevie quit wondering? What if Fat Albert quit The Cosby Kids. [time lapse] What if Ashford quit Simpson? What if Michael Jackson quit doing the moonwalk? What if Diana Ross quit The Supremes?
Julius: Diana Ross did quit the Supremes.
Chris: You get my point.
Julius: Just go get a job.
Chris: Okay.
Quote from Rochelle
Rochelle: What happened, baby?
Drew: I studied, but when I sat down, my mind went blank.
Rochelle: Your mind went blank? What kind of excuse is that? Did you eat breakfast?
Drew: Yes.
Rochelle: Well, did you get a good night's sleep?
Drew: Yes.
Rochelle: Well, boy, did you hit your head on a stupid rock on the way to school?
Drew: No.
Rochelle: Well, I'm gonna help you study for that next test. 'Cause I didn't raise no dummies.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Bush's mom says that, too.
Quote from Doc
Doc: Minimum wage. Shoot. There was a time when the maximum wage for Black folks was zero.
Chris: But now the government requires that you pay me $3.35 an hour.
Doc: Well, work for the government. Look, Chris, I like having you around and you do a good job. But I just can't spare the money.
Chris: It's only 35 cents more an hour.
Doc: 35 cent an hour... that's $28 a month. That's three cartons of milk a day, that's two boxes of Mike and Ike an hour. That's no.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That's when I realized I'd found the one person cheaper than my father.