Uncle Colm Quote #14

Quote from Uncle Colm in The Agreement

Gerry: Colm, I've been thinking about this business with Eammon's roof.
Colm: Desperate altogether. Ach, sure there's nothing worse. I remember one...
Gerry: OK! We're going to play a game. [picks up bread stick] You can only speak if you're holding this.
Colm: Fair enough, Gerry.
Gerry: Must get a bit lonely for you, rattling round that big house on your own.
Colm: I live in a two-bedroom terrace, Gerry. Oh, sorry. I live in a two-bedroom...
Gerry: Two bedrooms is still one bedroom too many. But what if Eammon came and stayed with you for a bit?
Colm: I don't know, Gerry.
Gerry: Why not? Sure, you'd be company for each other.
Colm: The thing is... Now, how do I put this? I'm trying to find the right word.
Gerry: What?
Colm: You don't have the breadstick, Gerry.
Gerry: Feck the breadstick. What is it?
Colm: Well, I find Eammon a bit... boring, to be honest.
Gerry: I see. [snaps breadstick and crushes it]

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 ‘The Agreement’ Quotes

Quote from Aunt Sarah

News Anchor: [on TV] Some of the proposed reforms have proved extremely controversial, particularly the early release of paramilitary prisoners. And now, with only days until the referendum takes place, voters across the country must get to grips with this booklet, a 30-page document laying out the Good Friday Agreement in simple terms...
Joe: Simple terms! Simple terms my arse. I've read through thon introduction 30 bloody times. I'm still none the wiser.
Mary: [opens microwave] Wow.
Aunt Sarah: Well, according to Shauna Sharkey, if you vote yes, you're allowed to swing both ways.
Gerry: What's that now?
Aunt Sarah: Well, you can be Irish, you can be British, or you can be bi.
Gerry: OK, I don't think "bi" is the correct term.
Joe: Says here you can hold both passports.
Mary: Two passports? That'd come in handy. I'm forever losing mine. I think I wouldn't mind being bi, you know.

Quote from Granda Joe

Joe: Er, the release of all paramilitary prisoners, both flavours.
[Joe points to two different packets of Tayto Cheese & Onion crisps]
Gerry: Both flavours?
Mary: Loyalist and Republican.
Gerry: Of course.
Mary: This is what I don't understand. What happens to the lads when they get out? I mean, what does an ex-paramilitary do?
Joe: Gardening.
Gerry: Gardening?
Joe: Have you any better suggestions?

Quote from Granda Joe

Joe: Right, as far as I can make out, this thing has two main aims. Firstly, to stop us all killing one another.
Aunt Sarah: Fair enough.
Joe: And secondly, to allow us to govern ourselves from here, rather than England.
Aunt Sarah: From Derry?
Joe: I would say so.
Gerry: Would it not be more likely to be Belfast? Belfast is the capital.
Mary: Aye, but that was an oversight, Gerry.