Jennifer Ravelli: Good morning, Dr. Solomon.
Dick: Good morning.
Jennifer Ravelli: I think perchance we picked a wrong foot off which to start. So allow me this olive branch, if you will, in the form of a cappuccino.
Dick: Oh, thank you.
Jennifer Ravelli: I don't know about you, but I like my "cappies" as I like my entendres... double.
Dick: And I like my "cappies" as I like my French farces... scalding yet frothy.

Dick: Don Quixote.
Jennifer Ravelli: Yes, it's very rare.
Dick: "Sin su general y el Castillo sin su castellano"
Jennifer Ravelli: Very good. But you don't get the full impact unless you hear it in its true dialect, Castillian.
Dick: Castillian?
Jennifer Ravelli: Well, if I may. Let's see... [lisps] "Sin su general y el Castillo sin su castellano. Asi como suele decirse".
Dick: I thee.

Jennifer Ravelli: And once again.
Dick: [lisping] "La mujer casada y moza sin su marido."
Jennifer Ravelli: No, make the tongue heavier. [Castillian] Casada.
Dick: Cathada.
Jennifer Ravelli: Sin su marido.
Dick: Thin Thu marido.
Jennifer Ravelli: Roll the "R." It starts in the back of the throat, and slowly off the tongue and off the lips.
Dick: Marrrrrido.
Jennifer Ravelli: Yes. I have a class. We'll pick this up later.
Dick: Oh, yes, please. You're a very inspiring teacher. With very shiny hair.
Jennifer Ravelli: I'll see you later.
Dick: Oh, have a nice class. Bye-bye. Good luck. Have a nice class.

Nina: So did you manage to go five minutes without biting Dr. Ravelli's head off?
Dick: Oh, yes. In fact, she's perfectly nice. Delightful woman. I love her. I love her?!

Sally: Aw, this planet's screwy! Oh, I mean, Nina and Eric are made for each other, but I can't get them to see it.
Harry: Well, you guys, maybe it's time to give up.
Sally: I don't know the meaning of the words "give up."
Harry: Well, "give" is a verb meaning-
Sally: I know the meaning of the words!

Dick: I just don't know what's what anymore! How can love work this way?
Tommy: It's totally random. It's just electricity. You can't control it. It doesn't mean anything.
Dick: You really think that's true?
Tommy: Of course it's true. That's just the way the machine works. "Cold fish." Aah!

Harry: Well, Dick, maybe it's the office, you know. Maybe you're destined to fall in love with whoever you share the office with.
Dick: That's ridiculous. If loved worked that way, there'd be office romances all over the place. Businessmen having affairs with their secretaries. Please!

Jennifer Ravelli: [laughs]
Dick: What's so funny?
Jennifer Ravelli: Oh, it's Moliere.
Dick: Oh, I- I never read him.
Jennifer Ravelli: Oh, you must. Listen. "Girl, you talk too much, and, I'm afraid, you're far too saucy for a lady's maid." [laughs] Amusing, no?
Dick: [giggles] No!

Dick: Mary! You're got to move Jennifer out of my office.
Mary: Dick, I don't have time for this.
Dick: Well, you've got to make time.
Mary: Okay. What's she doing that's so horrible?
Dick: Well... Okay, well... Well, she wears this perfume. I- I try to work but I- There it is, wafting all the way over to my desk.
Mary: Wafting? Uh-huh.
Dick: Well, she- She- She has this laugh. It's infectious. Like a disease!
Mary: Yeah?
Dick: Okay, uh, this might not sound like much, but she touches her hair a lot. And- And- And oh, never mind.

Jennifer Ravelli: I had no idea. Oh, Dick! I've never thought of you that way.
Dick: You haven't?
Jennifer Ravelli: No.
Dick: Oh, good.
Jennifer Ravelli: Until... you said that. I would never have dared dream that I could ignite a passion in such a distinguished mind as yours.
Dick: Distinguished?
Jennifer Ravelli: Oh, yes!
Dick: I didn't mean for this to happen. I didn't mean for any of this to- to- to happen.
Jennifer Ravelli: "Hope is a lover's staff. Walk hence with that and manage it against despairing thoughts."
Dick: That's beautiful.
Jennifer Ravelli: That's Shakespeare.
Dick: He's good. [they kiss]