Andy Quote #288
Andy: Okay, in that case I will now show you how to put this condom on... using this pencil. [Stanley laughs] What?
Oscar: Why would you choose a pencil Andy?
Andy: Well, I'm not gonna use my penis, Oscar! It's not exactly hard right now anyway.
Meredith: Come on, give it a rest pencil dick.
Andy: I'm doing this for you Meredith!
Meredith: I didn't want you it!
Andy: Well, did you- Why- Didn't- Does no one appreciate what I'm doing right now? [throws pizza box at wall] Whoa!
The Office Quotes
‘Sex Ed’ Quotes
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: Now, I'm no doctor, but it seems to me that we all have an obligation to the public health to track down anyone who gives us a disease, inform them of it, and take overwhelming revenge on that person. Again, I'm no doctor. I'm just a normal guy who enjoys revenge.
Quote from Darryl
Darryl: We should schedule meetings, 'cause the days can slip away with chit-chat. Are you crying?
Andy: No, I'm just sweating.
Darryl: I don't know what's got you upset but my advice is stop crying.
Andy: I'm not crying, I'm just sweating.
Darryl: Look, you need to pick yourself up. Man up, alright? You will win this in the end. It's all about heart, and character. Be your best self.
Andy: Okay.
Darryl: Yeah.
[aside to camera:]
Darryl: I have no idea what his problem is. That's just my standard advice. It's good advice, right?
Quote from Michael Scott
Holly: [on the phone] Michael, you cried at that tagline for a movie you made up.
Michael Scott: He had no arms or legs. He couldn't hear, see, or speak. This is how he led a nation.