Axl Quote #976
Quote from Axl in Find My Hecks
Brick: I can't believe I didn't see it. Feel like such a fool.
Axl: Don't worry. I am here to help. Now, I myself have never been valedictorian, but I did do something much harder. I dated them. Yeah. They may be smart, but they're still girls. So if Cindy's gonna play a game with you, you play one right back. When's the test?
Brick: Tomorrow.
Axl: Before the test, you're gonna walk up to her and speak the four words that strike fear into the heart of every woman... we need to talk.
Brick: [gasps] What do we need to talk about?
Axl: Who cares? That's what she's gonna be worrying about. Meanwhile, you're in her head, building your own condo with a big, geeky library in it.
Brick: Oh. I like this plan.
Axl: Yeah, she'll be so worried, thinking about what you want to talk to her about, she won't be able to focus, she'll do bad on the test, and... boom... you're valedictorian. King of the nerds. Or, uh, president of the nerds. Or... nerd overlord? Anyway, you're that guy. Want a refill?
Brick: Nah, I'm good. [places a dollar bill on the table]
The Middle Quotes
‘Find My Hecks’ Quotes
Quote from Mike
Mike: Hey. How was the movie?
Sue: How'd you know I went to a movie?
Mike: I don't know. You must've told me.
Sue: No. Brad and I went to lunch, and then we decided to see a movie last-minute.
Mike: Well, y-you're at Sbarro's. The theater's right by there.
Sue: How did you know I was at Sbarro?
Mike: You said you were at the theater. I figured you'd obviously go to Sbarro's. It's the only good Italian in town. It only makes sense. You know what? We're glad you had a good time. Bye. [closes the door on Sue]
Frankie: Okay, that's it. You're off the project. You're a security risk. I'm not gonna let you jeopardize this whole operation with your loose lips.
Mike: Okay, you know what? Fine. I'm out. I knew this was wrong in the first place. Dads aren't supposed to know what's going on. We like being in the dark. Let me know when the kids are getting married.
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: I found an app where you can track someone through their phone if they have the same friends-and-family plan. So now I know their whereabouts at all times.
Mike: You're spying on the kids?
Frankie: Well, you call it spying, I call it peace of mind. Now I don't have to worry 'cause I can see where they are. It's just... There's no arguing. It's a lot easier. It's kind of like when I used to sneak into Axl's room and cut his hair a little each night.
Mike: That did save a lot of screaming.
Quote from Sue
Sue: What's the matter, Brick?
Brick: Have you ever just wanted something so bad and you didn't get it?
Sue: Uh, yeah. I hate to brag, but I'm kind of an expert.
Brick: Well, Cindy and I are tied for valedictorian, and it's all gonna come down to who does better on our geometry final. [sighs] I mean, I've dreamed of being valedictorian since I was a kid. You know, finally being cool. But now I guess I'm gonna have to give it up for my girlfriend.
Sue: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Are you saying you have to let Cindy win because she's a girl? Is it harder for women? Sure. But we can succeed on our own merits, thank you very much. And we will never earn true equality if men keep propagating this "chauvinism in the guise of chivalry"... [Mike walks in]... way of thinking. Do you want me to get my Gloria Steinem book? [Mike turns around and leaves] It's just right over there in the pile.
Brick: No, no. You've convinced me. I get what you're saying. I just need to man up and kick butt on this test.
Sue: No, no, no, no, no. You are going to woman up, because I am going to help you. Flash cards, quizzes, whatever it takes. I am not going to leave your side for the next two days.
Axl: Hm! Hey, Sue! There's another party tonight.
Sue: I would stay, but Axl is being so nice to me right now, I feel like I've got to go.