Axl Quote #965

Quote from Axl in The Lanai

Axl: Oh, my God. We totally pulled it off! And you were a genius. I thought we were screwed till you threw ice, marshmallows, and mouthwash into a blender and called it [chuckling] the Blue Glacier Blast.
Hutch: Aw, it was nothing. Anyway, how about you? Using that big jar of marmalade that was already in the fridge when we bought the RV?
Axl: I don't know. I was just in the zone. I skimmed the mold off the top, put a scoop of it on a plate with just a hint of peanut-can dust, and bam... deconstructed PB&J.
Hutch: Hey. Well, we got to restock and get back out there. If we could do this much during lunch, while people are sober, imagine what we can do outside O'Brien's for Dollar Beer Night. [a fire starts to burn in the winnebago's kitchen]
Axl: Hey, we may be out of cheese, but we got plenty of bread.
Hutch: I tell you what... I'm not gonna be one of those stereotypes who gets rich and buys their mom a house. Now, I will buy a house, but if she's gonna stay there, she's gonna have to pay rent.
Axl: Hells yeah! If you let them, parents will just mooch and mooch.

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 ‘The Lanai’ Quotes

Quote from Brick

Brick: Hey, Dad, I'm running out of space in my room. Do you think your workers could come over and build me a bookcase? Maybe something in a dark walnut. I really want to make the books pop.
Mike: What? They're not gonna do that, Brick.
Brick: Why not? They helped you.
Mike: Yeah, that's 'cause they're my friends.
Brick: Oh, I thought they were only doing it 'cause you're their boss.
Mike: No. Where'd you get that idea? We're friends. Friends help each other out.
Brick: So you go over to their houses and help them with stuff?
Mike: Why don't you go outside with your mom?

Quote from Mike

Frankie: My lanai is screwed. They don't stop, Mike. Those stupid new neighbor kids are out there all the time screaming and yelling, and it's driving me crazy!
Mike: Yep. Yelling's annoying. [Frankie sighs] Come on. You remember how loud our kids were?
Frankie: What? They weren't loud. They were inside on video games all day. We were good parents.
Brick: What about the time Axl invented "garbage-can Jenga" and Old Lady Graber called the cops?
Frankie: Oh, that old bat was all up in everybody's business. She once turned a hose on Christmas carolers. What do you think I should do? Should I say something?
Mike: How many times in life have you asked me that, and how many times has your "saying something" turned out to be a good idea?

Quote from Frankie

Frankie: Hi! Just checking in. And I wanted to bring you a little something. Here's some Cocoa Puffs as sort of a welcome to the neighborhood. I know the box is open, but my son only had a small handful.
Diedre: Oh, gee, thanks. Everyone's so friendly. A woman named Nancy brought over a chicken casserole.
Frankie: Betcha she asked you to return the pan. [chuckles] What a pain. That box is yours to keep. There's a maze on the back. Anyway, it's a great neighborhood. Everyone is so friendly. We have a lot of fun together. I've got a brand-new lanai, so I'm gonna be out in the yard a lot, enjoying that baby.
Diedre: Oh, that sounds so nice. I know my kids are loving our new backyard. I can just open the door and let them go nuts.
Frankie: I hear ya... literally.
Diedre: As a matter of fact, we're gonna have a TV-free summer.
Frankie: Oh, yeah? Hmm. I don't know. Most of the experts have reversed on that. Turns out now they're saying a lot of TV is actually good. It's educational.
Diedre: [chuckles] Really?
Frankie: Uh-huh. I mean, if they don't speak Nickelodeon, hello, trouble! [chuckles] A little girl in this neighborhood was not allowed to watch Go, Diego! Go!... got into her parents' crème De menthe, rode her bike right into a tree. [chuckling] So...
Diedre: Well, we're gonna be an outdoor family now. Okay, but just so you know, this is supposed to be the worst tick season we've had in a while. Ticks have very acute hearing, so when they hear children screaming, it's like a dinner bell to a tick. The louder you are, the more they're like, [growling] "Yummy children!"
Diedre: [laughs] Well, I have a lot more unpacking to do, so...
Frankie: Oh, yeah. Well, be careful. [growls]