Mike Quote #739
Quote from Mike in The College Tour
Super Daddy Pancakes: Can you believe it? How are we gonna fill the hours when they're gone, huh? Soon, all we'll have are memories of those Sunday-night daddy/daughter dates, the Teddy-bear picnics, the scavenger hunts in the backyard.
Mike: Mm.
Super Daddy Pancakes: But, hey, it's the memories that sustain us. Am I right?
Mike: Not really. My son's at East Indiana state. And he's always home. They got a lot of vacation days.
Super Daddy Pancakes: I'm just saying. You got to savor every moment. Like, a couple of months ago, Maddie was going to her homecoming dance, and she wanted to borrow my red mustang convertible.
I mean, that car is my pride and joy.
Mike: Hmm.
Super Daddy Pancakes: But the morning of the dance, I washed it, cleaned the tires, and polished the leather... had that thing shining like new. Before she left for the night, I took a picture of her in her homecoming dress, standing in front of it. Well, here's the thing. Later, when I looked at that picture, all I could see was her and... how much time had gone. Didn't even see the car.
The Middle Quotes
‘The College Tour’ Quotes
Quote from Sue
Sue: Hey, Dad... Why do you think the tour guide gave me all these brochures? There's a Cherokee weaving workshop, and here's one on the headdress exhibit at the art museum.
Mike: Hmm, that's weird. They didn't give that stuff to anybody else?
Sue: Mnh-mnh.
Mike: I don't know. It's not like you're Native American.
Sue: Yes, I am.
Mike: N-no, Sue. You're not.
Sue: Sure, I am. I mean, that's what I put on my forms.
Mike: What? Why did you do that?
Sue: 'Cause I'm a native of America. I'm a native American.
Mike: Sue, now they think you're Native American!
Sue: Right, a native American.
Mike: [sighs] Say, "I'm a native American."
Sue: I'm a native American. Oh! I hear it now. Well, what was I supposed to check? There was no other option that seemed right. It's not like we're "ca-kah-zee-an."
Mike: Actually, Sue, we are.
Sue: What?! Oh, my God, this is horrible! They're gonna think that I tried to pull one over on them, that I lied on my forms, and it says it's a felony to lie on those forms. Oh, my God! I committed a felony! [music box plays] [vomits]
Quote from Axl
Frankie: Axl, have you ever cleaned that bathroom?
Axl: Hey, we're on it. We're flushing every time now.
Frankie: Seriously, if you ever want to have a girl over here, you got to take care of that. Do you even have any cleaning products?
Axl: I don't know. Did you bring cleaning products? [chuckles]
Quote from Sue
Butler Tour Guide: Hi, gang. Welcome to Butler. I can't wait to tell you all about our beautiful campus. [Sue raises her hand] Oh.
Sue: Okay, yes. Hi. I just wanted to say that I am White. All White. So I'm only interested in clubs for White people or art made by only White people. Not native Americans, because I'm definitely not that. So please don't show me anything or talk to me about anything that is not exclusively for White people.
[cut to Mike and Sue in the car:]
Mike: Well, that school was a little out of our price range, anyway.
Sue: I just didn't want people to think that I lied on my application or that I was a liar in any way. I just wanted to make it clear what I was.
Mike: Oh, I think you made it very clear.