Mike Quote #629
Quote from Mike in The Carpool
Jim: Hey, if you're looking for someone to go with you, I'm free.
Dave: Hold on. You're taking Jim?! I'm the one who usually gets injured around here! If anyone gets to go to the game with Mike, it should be me.
Mike: Look, guys...
Chuck: I invited you to Metal-Fest, Metal-Mania, Hedonism II in Jamaica. The Chuck's starting to think you don't want to hang out with the Chuck when all the Chuck has done is really just put himself out there, man.
Dave: Mike's old! He doesn't want to go to Metal-Fest! Besides, I'm the one that he usually does stuff with.
Jim: Well, that makes you a boss-hog.
Chuck: And a kiss-up.
Dave: He went to my church.
Jim: You know what? We're text-message buddies.
Chuck: ...a lot more chill at work.
Mike: Guys. Hey, guys, look, I'm not taking anybody from work, okay?
Jim: You know what? We may not have had a workplace injury, but we do have an internal one... [points to his heart] right here.
The Middle Quotes
‘The Carpool’ Quotes
Quote from Axl
Hutch: Damn. I was gonna hit you, but it looked like somebody beat me to it. What's going on? I haven't seen you in days.
Axl: I'm dying here, man. I'm crapping out in my real classes 'cause I'm spending so much time studying for a class I'm not even taking just to hook up with a girl. Now, when I say it out loud, it does actually make sense. I can't keep this up. Kenny, you got to help me, man. You got to help me, Kenny! Kenny!
Hutch: Hey, game over, man. Time to pull the rip cord. You got to come clean with this chick.
Axl: No. It's been so long since I touched a girl, Hutch. I thought when I came to college, it'd be this buffet of women from all around the world... Kentucky, Illinois, Northern Illinois but it isn't, man. It just isn't!
Hutch: Okay!
Axl: [feels pulse] What does a heart attack feel like?
Quote from Frankie
Frankie: [v.o.] Axl was lucky. He only had one person mad at him. I had three.
[Bill honks his car horn outside]
Frankie: Damn it! I let you stay up late to watch the finale of Shark Tank after you promised me you would wake up early! What are you doing?
Brick: I'm jazzing up breakfast with a banana.
Frankie: Oh, no. Breakfast is over. Here. You can have it for lunch.
Mike: Axl says he can't go to the game 'cause he's boning up for some big astronomy test. Did you know he was taking astronomy?
Frankie: Of course I know he's taking astronomy. I'm his mother.
Quote from Frankie
[Nancy honks her car horn outside]
Frankie: Damn it! I let you stay up late to watch Undercover Boss 'cause you said you could handle it. Now, where are your shoes?!
Brick: I was hoping you'd know.