Hutch: Damn. I was gonna hit you, but it looked like somebody beat me to it. What's going on? I haven't seen you in days.
Axl: I'm dying here, man. I'm crapping out in my real classes 'cause I'm spending so much time studying for a class I'm not even taking just to hook up with a girl. Now, when I say it out loud, it does actually make sense. I can't keep this up. Kenny, you got to help me, man. You got to help me, Kenny! Kenny!
Hutch: Hey, game over, man. Time to pull the rip cord. You got to come clean with this chick.
Axl: No. It's been so long since I touched a girl, Hutch. I thought when I came to college, it'd be this buffet of women from all around the world... Kentucky, Illinois, Northern Illinois but it isn't, man. It just isn't!
Hutch: Okay!
Axl: [feels pulse] What does a heart attack feel like?