Barry Quote #792
Barry: Adam, it's recently come to my attention that I need a best man, and I've made my choice.
Adam: Naked Rob, right? He's the heart and soul of the JTP.
Barry: No, dummy. It's you, 'cause you're my brother and you mean the stupid world to me.
Barry: Stop. Don't make this all weird and tearful.
Adam: I-I just can't help it. It's just such a wonderful moment for us.
Barry: No! Don't you dare feel deep emotion, 'cause then I'll feel it, too!
Adam: [voice breaking] I just I have a brother who loves me so much.
Barry: It's true. We got to do man stuff fast.
Adam: We can battle on my official "Over the Top" arm-wrestling table.
Barry: [voice breaking] I'm gonna break all the little bones in your little bird hand.
Adam: Do it right now. Be Stallone. Go over the top and pin my arm.
Barry: Oh, no! Now we're just holding hands and staring into each other's teary eyes.
Adam: Your fingers are so gently entangled in mine.
Barry: It's like you're my missing puzzle piece!
Adam: I don't know where I stop and where you begin!
Barry: No! If you cry tears of love, then I'll cry tears of love.
Quote from Bill Lewis
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Even though my mom treated my dad to a new Bitter, it just made him more bitter than ever.
Murray: I mean it, Bevy. I'm returning that damn car. The last thing I need is the Ferrari of Austria.
Bill Lewis: Sure you do. Those people make a quality product. They gave us the boomerang and Crocodile Dundee.
Beverly: It's Austria, not Australia. My God. Just let me handle this, okay?
Quote from Bill Lewis
Adult Adam: [v.o.] In that moment, my dad would ask a question that would change the course of history.
Murray: What's that?
John Calabasas: That, my friend, is the Bitter. It's Austrian. So very rare.
Murray: Kind of looks like a Ferrari. I really loved those as a kid.
Beverly: Come on, Murray. For once in your life, just treat yourself.
Bill Lewis: And what a treat! Hey, Mur! Individual seat heaters! You know what they call that? "The marriage saver." Maybe if I had these bun toasters, I'd still be married. [laughs] Who am I kidding? We had separate bedrooms, only said hi in the hallway. But come on! Ah, [bleep] it.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Time to talk bachelor party, best man. Last night, I taped a movie off Cinemax starring Tom Hanks that forever changed my life. "Bachelor Party."
Dave Kim: My dad said that movie was a raunchy shlockfest that celebrates the lowest form of comedy.
Barry: Your dad knows his stuff. It is brilliant, and I want it to be the blueprint for my zany bachelor party.
Adam: What exactly do you mean by "zany"?
Barry: I'm talking about a giant rager in a hotel suite with sketchy babes, unruly Japanese businessmen, and a beer-guzzling mule that passes out.
Adam: That sounds very adult.
Barry: Exactly! Everyone's saying I'm just a dumb kid who's stupidly getting married. But this party will prove I'm a dumb adult who's stupidly getting married.