Erica Quote #601

Quote from Erica in A Light Thanksgiving Nosh

Erica: Okay, let's pick teams. I, of course, pick my mom.
Beverly: Yes. Thank you, sweetheart. I knew you... [Erica points to Linda] Damn it! You mean Linda, don't you?
Erica: Yep. And I'm gonna scoop up Joanne, too.
Beverly: So now I'm stuck with the Schwartz men? How is that fair?
Mr. Glascott: And I'll be the referee because the tension is palpable in the fall air.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] And so, there on the chilly ryegrass of the Schwartz backyard, warriors faced off. On one side, my mom, determined to reclaim her status as top mom. And on the other, my sister, ready to defend her mother-in-law at all costs. It was a game for the ages.

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 ‘A Light Thanksgiving Nosh’ Quotes

Quote from Beverly

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Back in the '80s, my mom was famous for always getting her way. She bulldozed everyone, teachers, store employees, even her own friends. But my mom's arm-twisting was about to get tested when those friends became family.
Linda Schwartz: Erica! I need to get a head count for Thanksgiving dinner. Is your mother around?
Beverly: [grunts] 26 1/2 pounds is a lot heavier than you think. Oof.
Geoff: Where do you buy a bird that big?
Beverly: Oh, I've had this gobbler since he was a chick. I'd hand-feed him peanut butter, corn, and pasta carbonara every day until my relentless forced-gorging did what it do. [chuckles] [squawks] "My name was Popcorn."
Erica: That's so dark.
Beverly: The dark meat is the juiciest.

Quote from Geoff

Geoff: What's up, Mom?
Beverly: Ooh, yeah, that still doesn't feel right.
Mr. Glascott: It's wildly uncomfortable for everyone involved.
Geoff: There's got to be something that speaks to our closeness. [montage] Mee-maw? Mamacita? Mommers? Mommaroony? Mumsy? Mama-lou? Queen Mother? Mamasaurus Rex? Mother Superior? Bahama Mama? The Bev Train? Choo-choo. Big Mama? She's a fine Mama-Jama? Ooh, how about just "Beverly"?
Beverly: Sorry. None of these are working.
Geoff: But, Mrs. Goldberg...
Beverly: Bup-bup! That's the one.

Quote from Beverly

Linda Schwartz: Sorry to interrupt your pet's murder, but I thought I was hosting Thanksgiving this year.
Beverly: Well, that doesn't sound right, so it isn't. And I'm already three hours into a 15-hour seasoning process.
Linda Schwartz: So? I made little menus with a calligraphy pen.
Geoff: She calls yams "yums." That was actually my contribution.
Erica: That's not the brag you think it is. And, Mom, Linda clearly thought she was doing Thanksgiving this year.
Beverly: She can still be a part of the festivities. I need help with the bird. You will be scooping out Popcorn's giblets.
Geoff: Giblets are not as cute as the name implies.
Erica: Just a butt full of guts.
Beverly: I suggest putting down a beach towel, 'cause this juicy Johnny's gonna leak something fierce.