Bob: A little time apart will do you kids some good. So, Donna, I transferred you to the Catholic high school, Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow.
Donna: What?
Bob: That's right. You're starting this week so you better get out your Bible and brush up on your Ten Commandments and that thing about the dwarfs.

Eric: Look, Dad, I need my car. Don't you remember when you were in high school? I bet you had some good times driving around senior year with your friends.
Red: My senior year, I was driving a gunboat around Okinawa. And if you count the Japanese snipers as my friends... then, yes, I had some good times.
Kitty: You have to understand, Eric. It's not that your father's trying to be a bad guy. It's just that he's been irreparably damaged by war.

Red: Of all the dumbass stunts you kids ever pulled, this little California adventure takes the dumbass cake!