Eric Quote #711
Eric: The secret of life. You know what? I'm taking this one step further, fellas. I'm gonna get fat. Yeah, I'll never be strong, but I think I can be fat.
Hyde: That's a pretty thought.
[fantasy: Donna is stroking Eric's extremely rotund stomach as he lays in bed:]
Hyde: Come on, Fez, don't be scared. Go say hi.
Fez: No, he's too fat. I don't know where his face is.
Hyde: He can't eat you. He can't even move. Watch. [hits Eric's gut with a bat]
Eric: That tickles. Something's poking me. [Hyde pulls out an action figure] G.I. Joe! There you are.
Hyde: Wonder what else is in there.
Fez: Kelso! I thought you moved away.
Kelso: I've been living on crumbs.
[reality:]
Eric: All right, okay, laugh all you want. But all I see is a guy who doesn't have to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. And that's beautiful.
That '70s Show Quotes
‘I'm a Boy’ Quotes
Quote from Red
Red: Okay, let's get a couple of things straight. I don't want to be here. You don't want to be here.
Fez: I want to be here.
Red: Fine. I don't want to be here and I don't care what you want.
Fez: Okay, then, are you buckled up?
Red: Yes.
Fez: Hmm. Because the little blinking man on the dashboard says you aren't. Buckle up.
Red: No.
Fez: Yes.
Red: No. Look, start this car or I'm gonna pack you in a crate, take you down to the port, and trade you for a year's supply of bananas.
Quote from Red
Red: Still not speaking to me, huh?
Fez: Fine, I'll speak. I spent all day running your bald, grumpy ass around town and do I get a thanks? No. Because you're unpleasant.
Red: You want to know why I'm unpleasant? I just had a heart attack and now I have to be driven around like a useless dope by the idiot that married my daughter and gave me the heart attack in the first place. But I am also unpleasant because I just spent the entire day cooped up in the car breathing that mustard gas you call cologne. But mostly, I'm unpleasant because that's how it works in this family.
Fez: I'm family?
Red: Oh, crap.
Quote from Kitty
Donna: Eric, what is happening to you?
Eric: Look, Donna, I'm sorry, but I'm not regressing. You gotta understand, I'm the man of this house now.
Kitty: [enters] Okay, who's ready for Spidey and a sandwich?
Eric: Me!
Donna: Mrs. Forman, your son is a big, lazy child because you keep babying him.
Kitty: I don't baby him.
Donna: Is there crust on that sandwich?
Kitty: Well, of course not. Crusts are icky. They make Eric sicky. Oh, my God, I'm ruining him. Eric, things are going to change around here, drastically. Tomorrow, you are getting a sandwich with the crusts on. And no more crazy straws. You will be drinking your chocolate milk from a standard straw. Now, who's hungry?
Hyde: I call sandwich.
Kelso: I call Spidey.
Fez: I call sandwich you haven't made yet.