Eric Quote #58

Quote from Eric in Substitute

Mitch: Hey, buddy. Whoa, Eric, you didn't tell me you had an older sister.
Eric: Oh. Please, if you're gonna go with fake charm, let's keep it in the realm of reality, okay?
Mitch: Oh, you shut your porky mouth. I have the skin of a 25-year-old... who smokes.

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 ‘Substitute’ Quotes

Quote from Red

Bob: Wow, I love this place. It's not just dinner. It's a thrill ride, 'cause there's a small chance you're getting knifed.
Red: I don't know, Bob. I've tried to avoid Asians with weapons ever since 7,000 of them tried to kill me.
Kitty: Well... [chuckles] It's thanks to the work of brave men like you that America's enemies are working here for a minimum wage.

Quote from Red

Red: I just think it's pretty suspicious that after we left the Japanese restaurant our Japanese car broke down.

Quote from Bob

Bob: Okay, I'd like to thank everyone for coming back here with me. True, it is the place of my greatest humiliation. But the fish is good, the sake's strong, and these Japanese people are funny to watch.
Donna: That's the spirit, Dad. The slightly offensive spirit.