Red Quote #584

Quote from Red in Substitute

Bob: Wow, I love this place. It's not just dinner. It's a thrill ride, 'cause there's a small chance you're getting knifed.
Red: I don't know, Bob. I've tried to avoid Asians with weapons ever since 7,000 of them tried to kill me.
Kitty: Well... [chuckles] It's thanks to the work of brave men like you that America's enemies are working here for a minimum wage.

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 ‘Substitute’ Quotes

Quote from Red

Red: I just think it's pretty suspicious that after we left the Japanese restaurant our Japanese car broke down.

Quote from Bob

Bob: Okay, I'd like to thank everyone for coming back here with me. True, it is the place of my greatest humiliation. But the fish is good, the sake's strong, and these Japanese people are funny to watch.
Donna: That's the spirit, Dad. The slightly offensive spirit.

Quote from Eric

Eric: So yesterday I'm at this garage sale, I look down, and there it was. The Darth Vader action figure with the incredibly rare green light saber.
Hyde: How have I not kicked your ass yet?