Kelly Quote #69
Quote from Kelly in Safety Training
Kelly: Oh, I just... I'm getting in my head, then. Sometimes I do that thing where I act like every mistake in the world is my fault.
Amy: Yeah, except for this time, you wouldn't really be that far off.
Kelly: [laughs] Although it's like, I didn't make you crash the scissor lift.
Amy: No, no.
Kelly: Uh-uh.
Amy: But technically, I wouldn't have been on the scissor lift if you hadn't messed up the signs.
Kelly: I know, and then it's like, technically, I wouldn't have even been hanging the signs at all if Saint Patrick hadn't driven the snakes out of Ireland, so... How far back do we go?
Amy: Um... probably somewhere between the fifth century and this morning, I'm guessing.
Superstore Quotes
‘Safety Training’ Quotes
Quote from Marcus
Marcus: Cheese, what is it? Dried milk.
Amy: Uh, no. I don't think that's true.
Garrett: It is. It is, Amy. It's in a PowerPoint.
Marcus: Now, we all know the standard cheeses. American cheese, cheddar cheese, pizza cheese. But what if I told you there's one more out there?
Garrett: Pepper jack?
Marcus: No.
Jonah: Gouda?
Mateo: Swiss!
Glenn: Kraft Singles.
Dina: Goat, Parm, blue, ricotta. I could name at least ten more.
Quote from Sandra
Dina: But just so you know, Kelly's gonna start suspecting something if you keep lashing out at her.
Amy: What are you talking about? I don't lash out at Kelly.
Dina: [scoffs] Hey, Sandra, do you remember any time that Amy was lashing out at Kelly?
Sandra: January 4th, you said, "Kelly, I assume you've been to a monster truck rally." January 12th, you said, "Two people saying you look like Reese Witherspoon is not a lot of people."
Amy: Okay, we got it. Thanks, Sandra.
Sandra: January 20th, you said, "Wow, did they teach you that at pageant school?" January 21st, you said, "Wow, did they teach you that at pageant school?"
Amy: Okay, we got it, Sandra. Thank you.
Quote from Marcus
Marcus: No, guys, stop just yelling out random words. You're throwing me off. But what if I told you there's one more out there? Human cheese! [all retch]
Jonah: Oh, my God, is that what this is?
Glenn: I've had five samples already.
Marcus: No, no, this is just cut-up string cheese. I don't have enough money for a prototype. But it'll basically be exactly like that, I think. So who's ready to invest in the breast? It'll be udder-ly amazing!
Sandra: That's cows.
Marcus: Damn it, Sandra! You're messing with my flow. Ugh. [exhales, shudders] Cheese, what is it? Dried milk.