Janitor Quote #353
Quote from Janitor in My No Good Reason
Elliot: Janitor, thank you so much for helping me sneak Boomer in again, today.
Janitor: No problem. I once snuck a mongoose in this thing to kill all the snakes.
Elliot: Why were there snakes in here?
Janitor: I once snuck them in to kill all the mice.
Dr. Kelso: Where's the disinfectant, Lurch? I spilled soda on my desk this morning and now it's all sticky.
Janitor: [drinking] Well, I'm not allowed. Here, use this.
Dr. Kelso: You want me to clean soda with soda?
Janitor: Are you questioning the way I do my job? Did I question you when you did iliac bone marrow autopsy and failed to anesthetize the periosteum properly?
Dr. Kelso: No. No, you didn't. [dog barks]
Janitor: Hey. Hey, the little fellow figured out the latch. Just like the snakes.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My No Good Reason’ Quotes
Quote from Nurse Roberts
Dr. Cox: That was a coincidence.
Nurse Roberts: What?
Dr. Cox: That knife! It just happened to go into the exact right spot. You do not get a win for dumb luck!
Nurse Roberts: Look, if that's the way you choose to see the world, then so be it. But don't you dare try to take this away from me! I've been coming in here every day for 24 years, watching children die and seeing good people suffer. And if I quit believing that there was a bigger plan behind all this, well, I would just not be able to show up tomorrow, so just stop it!
Dr. Cox: I'm sorry.
Nurse Roberts: It's okay. You'd be surprised how many bad things happen around here for a reason.
Dr. Cox: Well, I wish I could believe that.
Nurse Roberts: It was awful that Jordan had to have prenatal surgery, but how have you two been since then?
Dr. Cox: Better than ever.
Nurse Roberts: Good night.
Quote from Jordan
J.D.: [v.o.] Since Jordan had pre-natal surgery, she'd been on bed rest. Dr. Cox, however, was not.
Dr. Cox: Okay, I made your breakfast, the kitchen's as clean as a whistle, I'm gonna drop Jack off at daycare on the way to work. Is there anything else I can do for you?
Jordan: I need you to go to the video store and get me anything with Viggo something-sen, I need white chocolate, strawberry seltzer, peppercorn brie, and a Polaroid of the tomato plant that I planted last spring because I'm worried it may have snails. Oh, and if you see that neighbor Lena from down the hall I want you to roll your eyes and say the word "Slut" under your breath, but loud enough so she can hear. And don't forget to be home by 6:30, because you gotta give Jack his bath before you make me dinner!
Dr. Cox: But when will I have time to kill myself?
Jordan: That's not my problem!
Quote from Dr. Kelso
J.D.: [v.o.] She didn't help things by bringing up Kelso's dead dog.
Elliot: Oh, come on, you brought Baxter to the hospital, when he was alive.
Dr. Kelso: Did you want to ask me something?
Carla: Can a doctor bring a patient's dog into the hospital for a visit?
Dr. Kelso: I'm going to say the same thing I said to my new gardener when he asked me for Easter off. "No way, Jose." His name's actually Jose. That's why I hired him.