J.D. Quote #1338
Quote from J.D. in My Road to Nowhere
J.D.: [v.o.] The secret to a great road trip is to get as many people as possible to come along.
J.D.: So, are you guys in?
Elliot: Totally! The last road trip I went on was with my sorority sisters and I went to Tijuana. So it will be nice to go with people who actually like me.
Keith: Why are you always so hard on yourself? Your sorority sisters probably loved you.
Elliot: Keith, they tried to sell me.
J.D.: You know, Keith, if the buyer hadn't been an undercover federale, Elliott would be a slave somewhere. There wouldn't be any uncomfortable sexual tension between us and you and I would probably be best-friends.
Keith: Yeah?
J.D.: Yeah!
Elliot: Keith!
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Road to Nowhere’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: Check out that body, bet you'd like to give her a ride, uh?
Ted: [staring at an old woman] Ooh, you bet-cha!
Dr. Kelso: Over here, perv. It's for my retirement, so Enid and I can see the country in luxury.
Ted: So it's a wheelchair accessable for her, sir?
Dr. Kelso: Ted, I'm not retiring for at least three years. If she's still alive, I'll deal with it then.
Quote from Turk
Turk: So you're here for your ultrasound, huh? I can't believe you're going to let him know the sex, especially when you could... No, that's too mean, I couldn't do it.
Jordan: No, mean is good. I like mean.
Turk: You could learn the sex, not tell Perry, hold it over his head, and play him like your little bitch-boy.
Jordan: Perry was so wrong about you. You're not an idiotic, scalpel-toting, basketball-dribbling , blood-sugar-watching, idiotic man-boy!
Turk: Stop.
Quote from Turk
[As Dr. Mickhead walks by with his phone, the "Guy Love" ringtone plays]
Turk: Mickhead! Give me my phone.
Dr. Mickhead: It's mine.
Turk: Oh, really? Does yours have a picture of Carla in the background?
Dr. Mickhead: Yes.
Turk: Ha! Trick question! Mine's got Tyra Banks, see?!