Chris Quote #189
Quote from Chris in Article Two
Chris: Ron Swanson and April Ludgate, literally my two favorite people in the catalogued universe.
Ron Swanson: April will not be participating in your pointless course because she has more important things to do like not participating in your pointless course.
Chris: I just want April to become as great a department head as yourself.
Ron Swanson: Which is why this is pointless. I've been head of the Parks department for 12 years, and I never had any "management training" course.
Chris: Ron, you've never been "CTMTS'ed?" I am legally required to CTMTS every department head. Otherwise, we are open to all kinds of liability.
Ron Swanson: What are you saying?
Chris: I'm saying that tomorrow during the seminar, April is going to have a classmate. And spoiler alert...
April: It's Alf.
Chris: It's you.
Ron Swanson: This went poorly.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Article Two’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Normally, if given a choice between doing something and nothing, I'd choose to do nothing. But I will do something if it helps someone else do nothing. I'd work all night if it meant nothing got done.
Quote from Ann
Ann: JJ's diner put an old waffle iron up for auction. It's the perfect breakfast day gift for Leslie.
Donna: "Breakfast day"?
[aside to camera:]
Ann: Leslie has anniversaries for everything. "Zoo day," first time we went to the zoo together. "Double date day," it was the first time we went on a double date. "Daniel Day-Lewis day." "Talk-like-a-pirate day." "Talk-like-a-Pittsburgh-pirate day," which why and how? This calendar was last year's calendar day present celebrating the first time she ever bought me a calendar.
Quote from Tom
Garth Blundin: Yeah, nothing warms the blood like an old whirly-bout with the old butter-gyre, eh, Leslie?
Leslie Knope: Indeed. Man, this guy's tougher than I thought.
Tom: I don't know how either of you guys are doing this. One time my refrigerator stopped working, I didn't know what to do. I just moved.