Tom Quote #99
Quote from Tom in Christmas Scandal
Tom: Hey, have you figured out what you're getting Ann for Christmas?
Mark: Oh, I got her a pretty great computer bag.
Tom: Yeah? That's a terrible gift.
Mark: No, no, Tom, she needs one. She mentioned it to me two months ago, and I wrote it down. That's what's called being an amazing boyfriend.
Tom: Have you seen Ann? You know how hot she is? Men give women of that caliber speed boats, private jets... Not computer bags.
Mark: Okay, what do you think I should get her?
Tom: Diamonds. Can't go wrong with diamonds.
Mark: Diamonds?
Tom: There isn't a woman alive who doesn't love diamonds. Even the super-left-wing chicks that saw blood diamond and cried... When they get a diamond, they're, like, "Yeah, bitch, gimme more of them blood diamonds! Make 'em extra bloody." Trust me.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Christmas Scandal’ Quotes
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: [aside to camera] In a 24-hour news cycle, the tiniest story gets dissected over and over again. In 2004, a kid from Pawnee went to the Olympics, and it was reported on for over a year. He wasn't even competing or anything. He just was going, literally, to watch the Olympics.
Quote from Leslie Knope
Leslie Knope: [aside to camera] It's gotten a lot harder to work in government. You think Winston Churchill ever had to pull his pants down and show his butt? No. But would he have? Yes. Now, could he have? Maybe not towards the end of his life, but he would have. Because he loved his job.
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: Oh.
Man: Yeah, I don't think kids should be allowed on the playground equipment.
Ron Swanson: Okay, we've been over this. If you're worried about swine flu, use hand sanitizer.
Man: I'm not worried about swine flu. I already had the swine flu. I'm worried about the turtle flu!
Ron Swanson: The turtle flu...
Man: Turtle flu.
Ron Swanson: Turtle flu.