Adrian Monk Quote #2265
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk and the Lady Next Door
Adrian Monk: Okay, Marge. If that is, in fact, your name. Let's try this again. Where are the jewels?
Marge Johnson: I don't know.
Adrian Monk: Tell me where they are! I'll talk to the D.A. Maybe he'll cut you a deal.
Marge Johnson: Adrian, why are you doing this?
Adrian Monk: "Why are you doing this?" Look, your son is just down the hall. Stottlemeyer and Disher are with him now. It's just a question of which one of you talks first.
Marge Johnson: Don't you call that man my son. My son is dead, and you know it.
Adrian Monk: Quit lying. Liar! You're worse than my own mother. At least she never pretended to love me. And by the way, your stupid scarf itches. [slams scarf down on table]
Natalie: Mr. Monk.
Adrian Monk: Not now! Not now. I'll tell you something else, your kitchen smells. Okay, your whole house smells. It smells like mold. And for the record, I was onto your little act from the very beginning. I was acting, too.
Natalie: John Keyes just made bail. He went home. His mother picked him up. His real mother.
[After Monk picks up the scarf Marge knitted for him, she walks over and takes it back before leaving.]
‘Mr. Monk and the Lady Next Door’ Quotes
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
Natalie: All right, so they broke in, they killed a security guard, and stole an egg-eating robot.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, could the machine possibly be involved?
Captain Stottlemeyer: What'd you say?
Lieutenant Disher: Well, in science fiction, they sometimes come alive. They become sentient. If this were a movie, you'd believe me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: If this were a movie, I could walk out, Randy.
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
Lieutenant Disher: It looks like it's an inside job. Security tapes are missing, and the store gets re-supplied the first Tuesday of every month.
Captain Stottlemeyer: And that was yesterday, so he was plugged in somehow. We're putting together some names, going back ten years, everybody that's ever worked here.
Adrian Monk: You don't have to go back ten years. The manager only worked here for a year. The killer wore a ski mask, ergo, the killer was afraid he'd be recognized, ergo, the killer must have worked here recently.
Lieutenant Disher: "Ergo" the killer? What's that, Hungarian?
Captain Stottlemeyer: His name isn't "Ergo," Randy.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Dr. Bell: You're a lucky man. [off Monk's silence] Adrian? Talk to me. Come on.
Adrian Monk: What's the catch?
Dr. Bell: With what?
Adrian Monk: With Marge. What do you suppose she's after?
Dr. Bell: All right, Adrian-
Adrian Monk: Every time somebody wants to be my friend, it turns out they're after something. They have an angle.
Dr. Bell: No, not necessarily.
Adrian Monk: How could somebody- How could anybody love me unconditionally? I mean, come on. You've met me.
Dr. Bell: Adrian, I know you've been burned in the past, but you have to trust people. See, there's not always a catch.
Adrian Monk: Then how do you explain this? There's always a catch.