Captain Stottlemeyer Quote #330

Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer in Mr. Monk Is on the Run (Part Two)

Captain Stottlemeyer: [on the phone] You got anything else? Any pay stubs?
Natalie: No, no pay stub. I have a birthday card and an unpaid electrical bill. Wait. Okay, there's a check for $10,000 made out to Angel County Children's Center.
Captain Stottlemeyer: [to Disher] Angel County Children's Center.
Lieutenant Disher: No such animal.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Okay, that check is dirty. Who wrote it?
Natalie: The Xanadu corporation.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Xanadu corporation. No, "X."
Lieutenant Disher: Xanadu, a division of the Orpheum investment group. Yeah, which is controlled by the Blue Danube Foundation.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Blue Danube Foundation.
Lieutenant Disher: Which is owned by... Oh, my God.
Natalie: Who's Dale Biederbeck?

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 ‘Mr. Monk Is on the Run (Part Two)’ Quotes

Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer

Natalie: I have to talk to you.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Natalie, what are you doing?
Natalie: Is this him? It's him, isn't it? He's the "Car Wash Columbo."
Captain Stottlemeyer: "Car Wash Columbo". Uh, Reginald, we need to take a break.
Reginald: Cool, I'll wait outside.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Nice try, kid. Jackson, could you baby-sit my young friend here for a minute? Go on.
Natalie: It's him, isn't it? [off Stottlemeyer's look] Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. [hitting Stottlemeyer] Why didn't you tell me?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Natalie, Natalie, Natalie, Natalie. I am so sorry.
Natalie: You're sorry?! But how?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Bulletproof vest. We couldn't tell anybody. "Leland Rodriguez"?
Natalie: That's his name.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Well, that's just stupid.

Quote from Adrian Monk

Dale Biederbeck: What did you win, Monk? Nothing! We're both back where we started.
Adrian Monk: Not exactly. The police in Dourados found something in Frank Nunn's apartment. Some old letters. He talked about killing Trudy. He mentioned the man who hired him.
Dale Biederbeck: You have a name!
Adrian Monk: Yeah, not quite. Nunn called him "The Judge."
Dale Biederbeck: The Judge. I can't help you, Adrian.
Adrian Monk: Can't or won't?
Dale Biederbeck: A little lead. How exciting. That should keep you off the street for a while.
Adrian Monk: The important thing is that you're off the street.
Dale Biederbeck: [laughs] You really think these bars can hold me?
Adrian Monk: [kicks the bars] Yeah. They seem pretty strong. Have a good life, Dale.
Dale Biederbeck: It's true, Adrian Monk! I'm in prison, but you're in a worse prison! You're trapped! Trapped by your own demons! You're in your own private hell! I wouldn't trade places with you for a billion dollars! I mean, another billion dollars! You hear me? Come back here! I'm not done!
Adrian Monk: Yes, you are.

Quote from Natalie

Natalie: And so these are gonna go to his brother Ambrose's house, and those will go to my garage.
Moving Guy: All these books. What was he, a professor?
Natalie: No, a detective. An amazing detective. He could look at a room or a person and see things that nobody else could see.
Moving Guy: Like the car wash guy.
Natalie: Yeah. What car wash guy?
Moving Guy: The guy in Nevada. I was just reading about him. Here. It's in today's paper. They call him the "Car Wash Columbo." He solved a big hit-and-run case single-handedly. Yeah. Sounds like a real character. His boss says it takes him a whole hour to wipe down every car. Won't even use the same rag twice.
Natalie: Can I see that?
Moving Guy: Yeah.
Natalie: There's no picture.
Moving Guy: I guess he's modest too.
Natalie: "Leland Rodriguez." His name is Leland?