‘First Days’
Season 5, Episode 2 - Aired September 25, 2013
When Luke and Manny start high school, their first day proves to be tougher for Phil and Gloria than the boys. Claire starts work at Jay's closet company but struggles to relate to her colleagues. Meanwhile, as Cameron fills in as a substitute teacher, Mitchell juggles taking Lily to school and an important work meeting.
Quote from Jay
Jay: How's that data entry going?
Claire: Good. I am up to 1998.
Jay: Ah, that's when I'd already been doing the job 20 years.
Claire: So maybe I should listen to you?
Jay: Get you home a lot earlier.
Claire: Thanks, boss.
Quote from Claire
Claire: Amazing. You guys are actually hanging out by the water cooler.
Office worker: I have xerostomia. It's chronic dry mouth.
Claire: I'm- I'm so sorry. I-I-I-I was just doin' a thang, you know, like...
Quote from Claire
Todd: That's Pritchett's daughter.
Claire: Um, yeah, but I don't want you to think of me like that. I'm- I'm a friend. I'm a colleague. I'm just like you. I'm Claire, you know, worker bee, just... [makes buzzing sound] Great to meet you. Sorry to interrupt, and see you around. I do- I got to do this one. Who am I? [as Christopher Walken] You can hang your clothes in me.
Officer worker: [unimpressed] Christopher walk-in closet.