Hal Quote #548
Quote from Hal in Polly in the Middle
Hal: Oh, listen, Polly, are you doing anything Friday night?
Polly: Oh, my God, I've been dreading this day. This is what happened on my last job. Of course he told me he only had six months to live. And, boy, did he live.
Hal: No. No, no. Polly, Polly... I was asking for my friend, Abe. He was here the other day.
Polly: Oh. Stevie's dad?
Hal: Yeah. Oh, he's a great guy. A lot of fun, a big heart, a great personality...
Polly: I know he's fat, Hal.
Hal: That wasn't...
Polly: Oh, no, that's okay. To tell you the truth, I prefer big men. So have him call me.
Hal: All right! But this should not be construed as a setup in any way, because he was going to ask you out in the first place. If you're gonna do this, you need to promise in advance that you're not going to stalk him or run him over with a car or suddenly decide he looks like your stepbrother and throw a steam iron at him.
Polly: I drifted off, Hal, but okay.
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Polly in the Middle’ Quotes
Quote from Stevie
Malcolm: [to camera] Since Stevie's mom deserted him, he's been living a little more dangerously. Yesterday he read a book in dim light. Now he's making his first prank phone call.
Stevie: [on the phone] Hello... is your... refrigerator... Yeah... it's me.
Quote from Malcolm
Malcolm: It's not a lucky shirt.
Reese: You shouldn't criticize things you're not equipped to understand, Malcolm.
Malcolm: It's a shirt. It's just fabric. There's nothing in there but atoms.
Reese: Luck atoms.
Malcolm: There are no luck atoms.
Reese: Everyone has some kind of luck, Malcolm. Like you, you're lucky at taking tests.
Malcolm: I bust my ass to get good grades.
Dewey: Why does my lucky shirt make you so mad?
Malcolm: Because believing in that kind of nonsense isn't smart or healthy or good for society. The world doesn't work by magic or superstition. It's rational.
Dewey: Maybe you believe that because all you're good at is thinking, and if the world isn't logical then you're lost.
Malcolm: Okay, fine. You know what, Dewey, luck this.
[When Malcolm throws a baseball at Dewey, it hits and the wall and bounces back into his own nether regions. ]
Malcolm: [gasps] This... proves nothing.
Quote from Abe
Hal: So, Abe, how's the divorce going?
Abe: It's a nightmare, Hal. Kitty is out of control. She wears these outrageous miniskirts to court, flirts with the judge...
Hal: What did your lawyer do?
Abe: He asked me if she could sit at our table.
Hal: Whoa. You know, Abe, it's been a while. Maybe you should think about getting out there again.
Abe: Oh, I've taken care of that. I've decided to spend the rest of my life in misery and die alone.