Dewey Quote #491

Quote from Dewey in Reese vs. Stevie

Hal: Dewey! Get out here right now. You're smoking again after we talked about this last week? You know what that does to you.
Dewey: I'm cutting back.
Hal: Cutting back? How many cigarettes are you smoking?
Dewey: Under two packs a day.
Hal: What?! How is that even possible? I got rid of the cartons in the garage.
Dewey: Well, you didn't get rid of the ones hidden in the crawlspace. Or the rain gutters, or under the ivy. There's thousands of cigarettes hidden all over the place. How could you spend all that money and not even smoke them? I could have gone to private school!

Rate

 ‘Reese vs. Stevie’ Quotes

Quote from Reese

[When Lois pulls into the driveway with a car full of groceries, she is listening to an audio book, "A Dish Served Deadsly" ]
Man: [on tape] While Betty kept the fat man occupied, I ducked down the hallway to his office.
If I found his phone records, they would prove that he was the one who called the police station on the night of the murder.
[that night, Lois is still in the car listening to the tape as she eats the food she bought:]
Man: [on tape] All I knew was, the next person through that door would be the man who killed my partner. "Hello, McKendrick," I heard from behind me. I spun around, but standing there was...
Reese: [on tape] A stupid housewife who wouldn't let her son buy nunchuks even though they're totally safe.
Lois: Reese!

Quote from Lois

Lois: All right, Jamie. The doctor said there's no physical reason you can't talk, so that is exactly what you are going to do. Talk. He said the best way to get you started is for me to talk to you constantly about everything happening around you so that you live in a more verbal world. That means Mommy's going to narrate everything she's doing, like right now when she's going over here to make you a snack. Then it'll be time to do the laundry, and after that she gets to make dinner for the whole family. Who will wolf it down in ten seconds and leave her to do the dishes by herself before she gets to make the boys' lunches for school the next day. Then she'll get ready for bed after everybody else. And discover that the bathroom is a swampy, hairy mess, and Mommy gets to spend her last waking minutes with a sponge and a can of cleanser. Then it'll be time to wake up in the morning and she'll do it all over again. Day after day, week after week, for the next 30 years until Mommy dies. And with Mommy's luck, even that won't be the end of it!

Quote from Abe

Abe: Ah. There you are. Stevie, you ran off without your backup inhaler.
Stevie: Thanks... Dad.
Abe: Did Stevie tell you his big news?
Malcolm: No. What's going on?
Abe: Stevie's been accepted as a research subject at the Norvet Biomedical Institute. Dr. Norvet himself picked him for the motor-neuropathy program.
Stevie: It's... nothing.
Abe: Nothing? Come on, Stevie. This is the most exciting thing that's happened to us since they put your stomach on the inside. Who knows? This Christmas might just be our first ski vacation.
Stevie: Dad.
Abe: Tomorrow after school we'll go look at snowboards.
Stevie: Dad.
Abe: I said just look.