Robin Quote #768
Quote from Robin in Splitsville
Barney: I knew you'd cave. Which is why I came up with a little extra incentive to break up with Nick. End it by 8:00 p.m. Tonight or this invite goes live.
Robin: "Robin and Patrice's BFF Fun Day"?
Future Ted: [v.o.] Kids, Patrice was a coworker of Robin's, who'd become sort of obsessed with her. Robin had managed until now to keep Patrice at arm's length. But if Patrice were invited to something called "Robin and Patrice's BFF Fun Day', she'd latch onto Robin and never let go.
Robin: Why would you do that? Delete that right now!
Barney: No! If I don't give you a little push, you'll let this drag on until Nick can have sex again and then you'll be right back to procrastinating on all fours.
Robin: I hate to admit it, but the man in the suit has a point.
Features in the collection: Robin and Patrice.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Robin and Patrice’
Quote from Robin in Lobster Crawl
[title card: "The Damsel in Distress":]
Barney: Hey, Robin, I just got your text. What's the big emergency?
Patrice: Hi, Barney! You seem like you run fast. Do you want me to fan you with my US magazine?
Robin: He's fine.
Barney: Thanks, Patrice.
Robin: Oh, thank goodness you're here. I just got this new printer, and I need somebody big and strong to take it to my office for me. I promise to repay you.
Patrice: We'll do it for you, Robin!
Robin: Don't you have a late-breaking weather story to cover, Brandi?
Brandi: Oh, I did it already. It rained.
Barney: Oh, I got to jump on a big Brobibs conference call. The lawyer from Dude Aprons is really busting my balls. See ya.
Robin: Nobody asked for your help, Patrice! You either, Brandi!
Quote from Robin in The Over-Correction
Robin: She can't see that Barney is using her, and it breaks my heart. You know, I love Patrice. We're like sisters.
Ted: You've never gotten through even one exchange without screaming at her.
Robin: Sisters fight, Ted! But the bond is always there.
‘Splitsville’ Quotes
Quote from Ted
Ted: Wow. Crazy, right?
Lily: Yeah. You know what'd be really crazy? If all of 'em got it on. Barney, Robin, Nick and those two women. And you just know Nadia's watching in the corner with her pet snake.
Ted: Okay, why aren't you two having sex?
Lily: What?
Marshall: Excuse me?
Ted: Lily has been slobbering over Robin's sex life like a cartoon hobo watching a pie cool on a windowsill. And you, the only other time you've ever exercised this seriously was when Lily had mono freshman year and I caught you doing one-armed push-ups with your genitals over a bowl of ice. So when did you stop doing it and why?
Quote from Marshall
Robin: Nick and I haven't had sex in three days. And it's your fault. Nick won't have sex because he pulled his groin muscle all 'cause you made him join your stupid basketball team.
Marshall: Did you say "stupid basketball team"?
Robin: Yeah.
Marshall: Oh, my gosh. Guys, we have to rush Robin to the hospital because, somehow, she swallowed her vocal cords and they got lodged in her rectum, because she's talking out of her ass.
Quote from Ted
Marshall: If Joel can use ringers, then so can we. And Nick is our best player, so as far as I'm concerned, you can both keep your groins on ice.
Ted: Groins on Ice. Least popular Madison Square Garden holiday show ever.