Lorelai: First of all, video poker is my calling. I think I'm totally gonna dedicate my life to it, especially the third machine in the second row of machines as you hit the entrance of trump Taj Mahal.
Rory: I'm more of a roulette girl myself.
Lorelai: And we did the whole thing up right. You know, we did the martinis at the blackjack table.
Rory: And we pretended I was turning 21 when were playing 21.
Lorelai: And we actually won and bought our 21 items.
Rory: Shot glasses, glow-in-the-dark coasters, salt and pepper shakers, pasties.
Lorelai: Oh, and look.
Luke: What's that?
Rory: 21 guys' phone numbers.
Lorelai: I must say I'm pretty proud of how quickly we got them and also of the fact that no one questioned us when we said our names were Wendy and Lisa.

Rory: We were walking...
Lorelai: Well, sort of walking, sort of drunk girls in high heels stumbling...
Rory: ...down the street, and we see this guy.
Lorelai: And, Luke, my hand to god, it's you.
Rory: It's totally you. Luke 2.0.
Lorelai: We came face-to-face with your doppelganger, my friend.
Rory: So we followed him.
Lorelai: Yeah, 'cause we had to. He went into this nightclub, so we followed him.
Rory: 'Cause we're now stalkers obsessed with getting his picture.
Lorelai: So we follow him through this grungy place and he goes backstage.
Rory: 'Cause he's in the biz.
Lorelai: Yeah, so we sneak behind the curtain, and we track him down. We told him all about you, and then I showed him your picture, and he totally freaked out.
Rory: Wait, I got it.
Lorelai: Luke, I want you to meet Derek McKinney, your twin separated at birth.
Luke: This is a man dressed like Dolly Parton.
Rory: You should hear him do "Jolene", amazing.
Luke: You think I look like a guy dressed as Dolly Parton?
Lorelai: I mean, a little less with the makeup, but check out the chins.

Lorelai: I can't believe you're going to a therapist. You know, they're totally gonna ask you about me.
Rory: What?
Lorelai: They always want to ask about your mother. It's okay. Say whatever you want. But make sure you start with, "My mother's very hot."
Rory: Yes, that won't seem at all disturbing to the doctor.

Sookie: Some people have mentioned some conflicts, and I think we should take those into consideration.
Lorelai: Okay.
Sookie: Miss Patty is going to be in Baja the first two weeks in April. And Babette said the last two weeks in April are bad because her cat's expecting kittens.
Lorelai: That little tramp.
Sookie: Michel's bad every Saturday from now until February because he signed up for his booty boot camp again. Kirk has no conflicts, but Lulu is going to Florida sometime between May 15th and June 1st.
Luke: Who's Lulu?
Lorelai: Kirk's girlfriend.
Luke: We're not moving wedding plans around for people whose last names I don't even know.
Sookie: Luke!
Luke: What?
Sookie: Who am I?
Luke: Oh, jeez.

Paris: Apartment 5 is Mrs. Holiday. She steals mail. Apartment 6 is the chili cheese boys. Take the description at face value. I don't know who's in apartment 7 because meeting 5 and 6 was enough "it takes a village" for me. Here we are, apartment 8.
Rory: Okay, great.
Paris: Okay, now, you have to unlock the middle bolt first, the bottom bolt second, the top lock third, the bottom lock fourth. You got to kick the door twice. And that's it.
Rory: Wow, you really have to earn it, huh?
Paris: It's just a precaution. It isn't really necessary. This neighborhood is only as scary as you make it. Those guys downstairs, they just look deadly. Believe me, they don't bother you if you don't bother them. When you have guests over, just tell them they're a doo-wop group.

Sookie: Maybe I wrote it down wrong. "Across the street from a butcher." Or a "barber." Or a "Barbara." "Across the street from a Barbara." Ooh, I wonder if it's a famous Barbara, like Streisand or Mandrell.

Lorelai: Well, the dress is strapless, so, hello, summer wedding. And summer means daisies, so flower choice done. And we went into the stationery store, and there was the perfect daisy invitations, which I know sounds a little girly, but, seriously, there are no macho wedding invitations, so please just give me this one, okay?
Luke: Okay.
Lorelai: Okay, so I bought the invitations. The place is running a special. They print the invites and mail them for you and handle the RSVP list, so that's done. Then we go to get some coffee, and in the window of the coffee shop, there is a picture of a beautiful rose-covered church. I thought, "Gee, that's pretty. I wonder where that is." And do you know where it is?
Luke: No.
Lorelai: Right around the corner from the coffee shop. So we went in and talked to Pastor Todd.
Luke: Pastor Todd?
Lorelai: And the church is perfect. And out back, there's a separate function hall with these floor-to-ceiling windows and doors that open out. And behind the hall is this old carousel.
Luke: A carousel?
Lorelai: From 1850. And it should be fully restored and working by June 3rd, which, by the way, is the date of our wedding.
Luke: June 3rd?
Lorelai: Yes, which is also miraculously a date that absolutely no one in stars hollow has a conflict with, and the pastor was running a special.
Luke: A special?
Lorelai: Yeah. I rented the church, and he gave me the hall for half price, and he threw in the use of the carousel for nothing. And his sister runs a catering company, and Sookie blessed it, and so basically that's it. We're done.

Paris: Sit down, Logan.Let's have a little talk about your future.
Logan: Sure, Paris.
Paris: Now, I know you think your sugar daddy runs the world, and that includes this paper, and possibly in the past that was true, but not anymore. You don't scare me. Your daddy doesn't scare me. Your mommy doesn't scare me. If you have a brother, a sister, or a really angry cat, they don't scare me, either. Hey, either spin a plate on your nose while you do that or cut it out, 'cause I am speaking.
Logan: Sorry.
Paris: Oh, you will be. Now let's talk about deadlines, emphasis on "dead."

Lorelai: Rory.
Rory: Come on, it's not so bad.
Lorelai: It's Angela's Ashes.
Rory: It's basic.
Lorelai: It's Sanford and Son.
Rory: Mom, the neighborhood is safe.

Luke: I feel like an idiot.
Kirk: Just relax, Luke. It should only take a couple more minutes.
Luke: I've been following you around for half an hour.
Kirk: I know there's a wireless internet hub around here somewhere. Ah! No. Encrypted. I used to use the bank's access, but I had to stand right in front of the Versateller machine, and they got very snippy about that. And Doose's had it for a while, but Taylor but a block on it. It's sad what this world is coming to.