Richard Quote #156
Richard: So, been reading anything good lately?
Rory: I'm very into P.G. Wodehouse right now.
Richard: Oh, that's great.
Richard: Actually, I've had a personal triumph of late.
Rory: Oh, yeah? What?
Richard: I've just finished the sixth and final volume of The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.
Rory: That is a triumph.
Richard: I started it in 1968. So it took only - what? - 36 years to finish it. But by God, I finished it.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: [on the phone] Why didn't you mention this to Mom at dinner? Maybe she would have been less panicked about what he's doing and the now-infamous glitter vest.
Rory: I don't want to open a can of worms.
Lorelai: How would that open up a can of worms?
Rory: If I told her what I said, I'd have to tell her I had lunch with him, a lunch I had previously not informed her of and that would have made her jealous and defensive. The less you tell Grandma, the better.
Lorelai: [gasps] By George, I think she's got it.
Lorelai: I have been trying to burn that into your brain since you were a baby, but you stubbornly resisted. Now a breakthrough.
Quote from Luke
Luke: You were never supposed to tip me, anyway.
Luke: I'm the proprietor. You're not supposed to tip the proprietor, even when they serve you.
Lorelai: You mean all those years, that extra 20% was unnecessary?
Luke: You never tipped me 20%.
Lorelai: Ooh. Now it's getting ugly.
Luke: You were a solid 15 percenter, sometimes less if the bill got higher. Way less if you were mad at me about something.
Lorelai: Well, it doesn't matter. I wasn't supposed to be tipping you, anyway.
Quote from You've Been Gilmored
Richard: Better not wait. Small gaps in your insurance coverage can lead to big mistakes. Oh, I could tell you horror stories.
Emily: Brian Hunter.
Richard: Yes. He owned a home for 40 years - huge mansion - never updated his coverage. One night, his trophy bimbo wife got into a drunken snit, lit a curtain on fire with her marijuana cigarette, and burned the place to the ground. He couldn't afford to rebuild. Lost his fortune, lost the bimbo.
Emily: Now he sells sunglasses out of the back of a van in California. Cheap ones.
Richard: Because he didn't update his coverage.
Quote from The Great Stink
Richard: Well, naturally I thought they were referring to the archduke. So I jumped in, as who wouldn't? With some thoughts about the various conspiracy theories surrounding his infamous assassination in Sarajevo. Imagine my surprise when I learned that Franz Ferdinand was the name of a very popular rock-'n'-roll band.
Emily: [laughs] That's what he gets for trying to fraternize after class with his students.
Richard: One of them even offered to burn a CD for me.