Emily Quote #470
Emily: So I lead her over to the good table, smiling like we are the best friends in the world, and I tell her, Shira, you don't think Rory is good enough to be in your family? "She is. We are just as good as you are. After all, you are nothing but a two-bit gold digger, and how you managed to bag Mitchum I will never know."
Lorelai: You did not.
Richard: Oh, yes, she did. I told her Mitchum still plays around.
Lorelai: Oh, no.
Richard: Tell her exactly what you said.
Emily: What did I say?
Richard: About her weight going...
Emily: Oh, yes, yes. I got it. I told her, "Mitchum still plays around, you know. Well, of course you know. That's why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every 3 months."
Richard: Ruthless woman!
Lorelai: I bow to the foot of the master.
Emily: I only wished I'd remembered to call her a cocktail waitress.
Lorelai: Ooh, ooh, that's my mother's version of the "C" word.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Keep him occupied for a second.
Sookie: Hi, Paul Anka. You want to come have a sleepover at my house, huh? What are you doing?
Lorelai: Uh, he freaks out if he sees his leash. You have to make sure you hide it from him, make sure he doesn't see you putting it on him.
Sookie: How is he once he's on the leash?
Lorelai: Oh, he's totally fine having his personal freedom slowly stripped away as long as he's completely unaware that it's happening. Just like a true American.
Quote from Lorelai
Lorelai: Hey. Did I wake you? 'Cause I brushed my teeth in the shower so you wouldn't hear the sink run.
Luke: No, you didn't wake me up.
Lorelai: But then it occurred to me while I was in the shower that you could probably hear the shower run, and that defeated the purpose of the whole shower-toothbrush combo.
Luke: Why are you up so early?
Lorelai: Oh, well, you know me.
Luke: I do, so why are you up so early?
Lorelai: I have chores.
Luke: It's 6:00 in the morning.
Lorelai: Well, it's early morning chores.
Luke: What's early morning chores?
Lorelai: You know, just milking cows, feeding chickens, slopping pigs.
Luke: You have to slop pigs?
Lorelai: Well, they're certainly not gonna slop themselves.
Quote from I Am Kayak, Hear Me Roar
Emily: It's like a canoe.
Lorelai: What's like a canoe?
Emily: You're just paddling along in a canoe.
Lorelai: Mother, have you ever been in a canoe?
Lorelai: Well, I just can't picture you in a canoe.
Emily: Your father and I have been paddling a canoe together for years. Only now, he's dropped the paddle. He just dropped it. Not only that, but now the canoe is going in circles. Without your father there, I'm paddling on my side and the canoe is spinning in circles, and the harder I paddle, the faster it spins, and it's hard work, and I'm getting tired.
Quote from Driving Miss Gilmore
Lorelai: Here we go.
Emily: What is this?
Lorelai: This is my car.
Emily: We can't go in this. We have to take the other car.
Lorelai: What other car? No, Mom, that's not a car. That's a rap-video set.
Emily: I ordered it specially. It has the darkest windows available. They say it's the car Jay-Z uses when he's in town. I assume that's an entertainer of some sort. The windows are bulletproof. They kept saying that as if it's a selling point. I told them I was not paying extra for bulletproof windows. I haven't been strafed in years.