Rory: I want to see it in the store.
Jess: I can give you the addresses.
Rory: You know what I'm gonna do when I see it in the store?
Jess: What?
Rory: You know that section toward the front, the staff recommendations? I'm gonna grab a copy of your book and put it in that section, and then I'm going to write my own little recommendation on a card and attach it so people see it and buy it.
Jess: Read it first. That way you can discourage people from buying it.
Rory: No way! I know it's good. Jess, you've got such a great brain. I knew that if you could just sit down and stop shaking it around, you could do something like this. I knew it. I knew it.
Jess: I know you did. I work at that press now. Five smelly guys in a cramped room on Locust Street putting out about three books a month... but it's fun. It's fun.

Lorelai: It was- It was- [stammers]
Luke: Violent.
Lorelai: Scarface on a soccer field.

Luke: You been here all night?
Lorelai: Uh, I kept thinking I heard him.
Luke: Yeah, he does snore occasionally.
Lorelai: And then he was cold, so I put his jersey on him.
Luke: Yeah, I think he likes it.
Lorelai: Yeah. Every time I'd go back up to bed, you know, after checking on him, I just was convinced that he needed me, so I came back, and finally I just ended up here.
Luke: That's as good a place as any.
Lorelai: Yeah. He doesn't want to eat anything. I had all these milk-bones ready for him, but he doesn't want anything.
Luke: What's the baster for?
Lorelai: In case he's thirsty, but he can't lift his head, so I can just shoot water in his mouth.
Luke: Got it.
Lorelai: Doesn't seem to want anything.
Luke: He's gonna be okay. He's strong.
Lorelai: He's so helpless. It must be so awful to be sick when you're a dog 'cause you can't run or play, and you don't watch TV or do anything to pass the time. Watching a lot of TV is the only good part about being sick.

Lorelai: And the thing with the shoes, he was trying to tell me something.
Luke: What?
Lorelai: He was trying to tell me to put my shoes on and take him to the vet because he felt something coming on, and he was trying to ward it off, and I didn't take him.
Luke: I don't think that's why he was playing with your shoes.
Lorelai: I tried so hard. I have a list of things that he's afraid of on the fridge, and I tried to do the right thing. I should not have so socialized him at Kirk's doggy day care the other day. I should have taken him to the best doggy day care in the country, even if it was in Seattle. That's where I should have taken him.
Luke: He's fine hanging with Kirk.
Lorelai: I did this wrong. I did this all wrong. How could I have let this happen? How did I not see it coming? How didn't I step in and do something, and why can't I fix these things?
Luke: Hey.
Lorelai: I'm a bad mother!
Luke: You're not a bad mother. Oh. Did you sleep at all?
Lorelai: A little.
Luke: You stay home this morning. I'll call Sookie and tell her you'll be late. He's gonna be okay.
Lorelai: I hope so.
Luke: Everything's gonna be okay.

Rory: What are you doing here?
Jess: I got a job: professional driveway stalker.
Rory: Pays good?
Jess: Yeah, but the hours suck.

Rory: See, don't get the wrong idea. I'm just here temporarily. My mom and I-
Jess: Luke alluded to something.
Rory: It's a long story. I was crashing in the pool house, and that was just temporary, but the pool house became storage, so then I had to move into the main house. All temporary.
Jess: Isn't school in session?
Rory: Uh-huh.
Jess: Why aren't you living on campus?
Rory: Because I'm not going.
Jess: You graduate already, Doogie?
Rory: No. I'm just taking a little time off.

Lorelai: Your impatience is very distracting.
Luke: I said nothing.
Lorelai: I'm getting a vibe.
Luke: I can't control my vibe.
Lorelai: Maybe I should do this alone.
Luke: No.
Lorelai: But I need to collect my thoughts.
Luke: No, the last time I left you alone with your thoughts, I came back and you were in the reds again.
Lorelai: So?
Luke: We've ruled out red.
Lorelai: Why did we rule out red?
Luke: Because you don't like red.
Lorelai: Right. And when I'm right, I'm right. Red would be way too much in here.

Lorelai: Why did I say I don't like red?
Luke: I think your exact words were, "better dead than red."
Lorelai: 'Cause I'm liking red now.
Luke: What happened to the white you picked? That was such a nice white, and you were so sure about it.
Lorelai: It didn't go with Paul Anka.
Luke: Unbelievable.
Lorelai: [holds color chart next to the dog] Look.
Luke: Oh, yeah. You're right. That does not work, not at all.

Lorelai: It's perfect. A light, slightly washed-out green like you see in renaissance wall paintings, with the baseboards painted an aquamarine blue, but dulled so it's got a little Latin touch. And you paint the ceilings off-white with a hint of yellow to go great with the floors and just give the whole space a nice glow. What do you think?
Luke: We're not painting my apartment.
Lorelai: Why not?
Luke: Because we're painting your house. That's why you have the color samples.
Lorelai: And there's not enough paint to paint your place and the other place?
Luke: There's not enough time. As you work on the perfect colors for my house and Babette's house and Mr.
Lanahan's house and Sookie's house-
Lorelai: Oh, I showed Sookie that blanched almond. She flipped.
Luke: And the post office and the Church and the Odd Fellows hall, the painters are getting closer and closer to being ready to paint your house.

Lorelai: It's just a sponsorship, and they're from your alma mater, which, by the way, is looking drap and could use a touch-up. I'd recommend the light salmon. Doesn't that mean something?
Luke: I guess a little.
Lorelai: You don't even have to go to the games, and you'd get to have your name on the back of the jerseys. Free advertising, how cool is that?
Luke: Well, yeah, that might be all right.
Lorelai: Hey, and you'll get that photo that sponsors get of the whole team sitting on the field, and you can display it like Al's pancake world does. Ooh, Al - that sea-green with burnt-sienna trim.
Luke: I warned you.
Lorelai: I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Come on. Give it back, please. I'm jonesing. I need my colors. Please.