Martin: I really liked your friend, Roz.
Frasier: What?
Martin: Roz, at the party tonight. Nice gal. Why don't you ask her out. She's great-looking and she can really hold her liquor.

Frasier: I recently gave a small but elegant soiree at which Martha Paxton was in attendance, you see. She told me that this painting was not her work.
Phillip Hayson: Oh dear, I can imagine how embarrassing that must have been.
Frasier: I doubt you can, Mr. Hayson.

Martin: What are you still doing with that? I thought you were going to return it.
Frasier: They wouldn't take it back. All I got was a cheap glass of wine. Loire Valley, my ass.

Daphne: Maybe I'll go check in the hallway. It might have gotten trampled into the carpet when everybody stampeded for the elevator.
Frasier: No one stampeded! They were all just good guests, they knew when to leave.
Niles: Two hours early.
Frasier: Oh, shut up, Niles!

Frasier: So Hayson just gets away with it. He's sitting there right now with his brie and his wine and his little chuckle at my expense. I finally understand why people take matters into their own hands. It would be so satisfying right now to just slash his tires or throw a brick through his window or something. Just so he'd learn that you don't do this to people and get away with it.
Niles: I know you, Frasier, and I know you would never resort to that sort of thing. Would you, Frasier? There's a vein throbbing in your forehead.

Daphne: Give me the other earring. Maybe I'll get something. Oh, yes, I'm getting a feeling. It's in your father's room. No, it's in Dr Crane's room. No. Oh, this is odd. Now it's in the hallway.
Niles: Eddie!