Mia: I'm Mia. Mia Preston.
Frasier: Mia. Mia Preston? The children's book author?
Mia: Yes.
Frasier: Oh, my goodness. "Panda in the Parlor." Oh, wow. I love that book, I've read it a hundred times.
Mia: I'm impressed. Most of my readers can't even count that high.

Frasier: So, what do you think of her?
Niles: Well, she's wonderful, but Frasier... Does she remind you of anyone?
Frasier: Oh, you noticed that, too.
Niles: Are you kidding? The minute I laid eyes on her.
Daphne: Even I can see it.
Frasier: Really? Well, she does look a bit like Roz, but she's a totally different person. You know, in fact our relationship is unlike any I've ever had before.
Mia: Come on, handsome. Let's go buy you some pants.
Frasier: Oh, okay.

Niles: Dad, would you hand me that valise. I want to put on some bug repellent.
Martin: Oh, sure. Ooh, it's kind of heavy. What you got in there?
Niles: Bug repellent.

Frasier: It just amazes me that a good psychiatrist can be so blind of something so obvious.
Mia: Oh, honey, your poor thumb. We should go put something on that.
Frasier: You know, okay.

Niles: [closing the open door] Oh, why don't we just send out engraved invitations for all the bugs of the forest?

Martin: Boy, being in this place really takes me back. Remember that summer I tried to teach you boys how to fish? You just didn't have the knack, so I went out and I bought these two big trout and snuck 'em on the boat.
Mia: Oh, Marty, you're terrible!
Martin: Yeah, and then I put the trout on their hooks and I dropped them over the side while you two were still arguing about the last Dramamine. I felt bad about fooling you, but hell, what's the harm of a little fantasy if it makes you feel good?
Mia: More wine?
Martin: Oh, thanks, hon.

Mia: Frasier, you've hardly touched your chicken. Is something wrong?
Frasier: Oh, no, no. It's just that, well, I'm having a little trouble holding the knife because someone dropped a log on my thumb.
Niles: Oh, it didn't hurt you that badly. You are such a baby.
Frasier: You are a baby, running and screaming because of a little moth.
Niles: I told you it was a bat!

Niles: Frasier, before you turn in, there's a little something we need to deal with.
Martin: Oh, Jeez.
Frasier: Oh, right. Dad, your birthday gift.
Martin: Oh, yes, my gift. My gift. I want to open my gift. It's my birthday this weekend, right?
Frasier: Come on Niles. It'll be fun, come on.
Niles: Oh, yes, fine.
Frasier: Oh, come on, seeing you and me, Dad and Mom?
Niles: You know, I'm getting more excited by the second.

Frasier: Oh, this is ridiculous. I'm being stood up on a blind date. I'm pathetic.
Roz: You are so insecure. God. Where does that come from? Jessica will be here.
Frasier: Jessica? I thought you said her name was Jennifer.
Roz: Jennifer? Jennifer goes out with a weatherman. She's way out of your league.

Frasier: Excuse me, ah. I suppose you noticed I was staring at your table and I was just wondering if that gentleman you're with, is he your husband?
Mia: No.
Frasier: Boyfriend?
Mia: No.
Frasier: Oh, wonderful.
Mia: Would you like me to introduce you? He just broke up with someone.