Aaron: It's cool, isn't it? Your brother having his own club.
Niles: Yeah, well, seeing all of you, I sort of wish I had a club myself.

Niles: Oh, well, this is good. It means he's reached the anger stage. In due course he'll go through bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance.
Martin: What's bargaining?
Niles: Oh, well, it's like when a person makes a deal with God to spare their life.
Martin: Oh, yeah, I know all about that. I remember right after I got shot, I said, "God, if I promise never to drink another bottle of Ballantines, would you let me get through this?"
Niles: Dad, you still drink Ballantines.
Martin: Not in bottles, baby.

Aaron: Hi, Daphne. It's Daphne!
Daphne: Hello. Have we met?
Doris: We know you from the magazine.
Aaron: April '96, Seattle Monthly, "At home with Dr. Frasier Crane." You were wearing an orange flower dress. And your hair was different then.
Daphne: Oh, how creepy. Do come in.

Martin: A little early for the piano, isn't it?
Frasier: Yes, I'm sorry about that. You know I woke up this morning thinking about that operetta I've been writing. You know, the one about Robert and Elizabeth Browning. I think, well, I had to get right to it.
Martin: Well, that's what you get living in a big city. If it's not the horns waking you up, it's someone writing an operetta about the Brownings.

Niles: Frasier, you know, I think you're dealing with the loss of your job as many people do with a death. Only you've got yourself stalled in depression, and I think you're going to stay there until you let yourself grieve. For everything you've lost. Your job, your friends, the money, your reputation.
Roz: You've got to let it out, Frasier.
Frasier: Well, I thank you all very much for your concern, but you know what, if I was repressing anything... [Frasier struggles to get up from Martin's chair. Niles and Martin help him up.] I would certainly know it. The only thing that I need to let out is these so-called big-and-tall lounge pants.

Gil: A word of caution on the hummus. To be avoided, as a leper would avoid a magic tea-cup ride.
Roz: Gil, Frasier made that.
Gil: Oh, I'm so sorry.
Frasier: Quite all right. I understand you need to flex your critical muscles while you're between jobs.
Gil: Oh, good, then you might enjoy this one: "After sampling your unnuanced baba ganoush, I was tempted to describe your entire Middle Eastern buffet as 'The Sorrow and the Pita.'" Oh, who's got a pencil, I've got to write that one down.

Frasier: Excuse me, what have you got there?
Waiter: Uh, still the crab puffs. Shall I get you something else?
Frasier: Yes, please, bring me some spring rolls.
TV Anchor: Now on the lighter side, did you ever ask yourself, "What if they held a rally and nobody came?"
George: This is great, this is great!
Frasier: Eighty-six the spring rolls, bring me the freakin' turkey!

Roz: Where's the job?
Bulldog: Oh, all right, all right. It's that new all-sports station. I got the breakfast slot. I even came up with a slogan, "Coffee, eggs and Bulldog."
Frasier: Sounds like some sort of Malaysian Happy Meal.

Martin: Oh, come on, Eddie, you're supposed to go like this. [Martin rolls over on back]
Frasier: Well done, Dad. Now you just have to teach Eddie to say "It's all over."

Frasier: You know, perhaps you'd like to fill out these name tags while we wait for everyone else to come.
Aaron: Who else is coming?
Frasier: Well, the rest of the fan club.
Doris: This is the fan club, the three of us.
Daphne: Well, I'll be off to get those pens now!