Sam Quote #1293
Quote from Sam in Severe Crane Damage
Brenda Balzak: Well, all right, we've met the men. Let's put Dr. Sternin-Crane's thesis to the test. How many of us would like to sleep with Sam? [women applaud] And how many of you would like to sleep with Frasier? [Lilith and one woman in the back applauds]
Sam: In the back row.
Brenda Balzak: Sam, we know you're bad for us. Why do we want you so darn much? Is it because you're forbidden, untamable?
Sam: Well, now, you know, I think some girl could probably tame me. For example, that blonde in the third row there. No, no, nix that. Let's give the whole third row a shot at it.
Woman: What about the second row?
Sam: Oh, one row at a time, ladies.
Cheers Quotes
‘Severe Crane Damage’ Quotes
Quote from Frasier
Brenda Balzak: Frasier, how would a date with you go?
Lilith: Brenda, I find this line of inquiry sensationalistic and not at all pertinent to my thesis.
Frasier: Oh, no, that's all right, dear. I think I'd like to answer the question. Well, a date with me would, I'd say, be jolly good fun. [silence] Ironically, actually, I might add, that I used to date, actually, an old girlfriend of Sam's.
Brenda Balzak: So she preferred you to Sam.
Frasier: Oh, yes. Well, uh... That is, until she broke up with me and got engaged... To Sam. You know, I'd like to add in my defense, the woman was nuts.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Excuse me, Rebecca, may I have your honest opinion about something you know, as a woman who has fatally bad taste in men? Do you think I'm a... good boy?
Rebecca: Frasier, you have to stop doing this to yourself. Why do you feel inferior to Sam just because you're good? You know, I agree with that talk-show host. Give me a comfortable pair of old ratty house slippers any day.
Frasier: So that's how it is. Now I'm a pair of ratty old house slippers. At least this afternoon, I was an old shoe. You could at least wear me outside, maybe do a little gardening.
Rebecca: Frasier, I did not mean to imply...
Frasier: You think I can't be dangerous? Is that it? You all think I'm just an old slipper? Well, am I a good boy? Would a good boy do this? I am running with scissors. I'm going swimming right after lunch. I'm leaving now. I'm going outside. I'm going to pet strange dogs, no matter where they've been. Look out, world, Frasier Crane's going to raise some hell.
Quote from Lilith
Brenda Balzak: Ladies, look, let's keep this a civilized discussion. If you have points to make, we'll take them in an orderly fashion. [a woman raises her hand] Yes.
Woman: I have a question of a more serious nature.
Lilith: Oh, good.
Woman: What does Sam look like with his shirt off?
Women: [chant] Shirt! Shirt! Shirt! Shirt! Shirt!
Brenda Balzak: Ladies, please. Let's get hold of ourselves.
Lilith: Now, this is the perfect example of what a bad boy like Sam can do to a room full of good girls like these fine women. One can't help but be attracted to his steely glance and the strength therein, to imagine the warmth of his skin pressed against ours, his arms pinning us down so we can't move. One sees his full lips and imagines what they must feel like slightly moist... Tugging at ours. Before long, one's feeling a little dizzy, and, oh, for God's sake, Sam, let the buttons fly. [lunges at Sam]