TV Quotes

Gob: Zero hour, Michael. It's the end of the line. I'm the first born. Sick of playing second fiddle. Always third in line for everything. Tired of finishing fourth. Being the fifth wheel. There are six things I'm mad about and I'm taking over.
Michael: You want to be in charge?
Gob: Yeah.
Michael: You want to deal with what I deal with a sister who takes your money and throws it away; a mother who you can't trust; a company whose founder may be on trial for treason- Is that what you want?
Gob: What kind of vacation time does it offer?
Michael: Yeah.

Michael: Gob, shouldn't you be in bed?
Gob: Well, we got a meeting with Dad's attorney today. He's gonna want me to take a lie-detector test to use as evidence in Dad's trial, but, uh, I don't want to. What if they ask about a magic trick? I just I can't risk it.
Michael: They're not gonna ask you anything. They want me to take the polygraph test.
Gob: But I'm the oldest. The matriarch, if you will.
Michael: Sure. I will.

George Michael: Well, maybe we're gonna end up together in the banana stand someday.
Michael: Mm. Well, there's always money in the banana stand.
George Michael: Right.
Michael: Where is that from? Is that from something?

Michael: It never made sense, because, you know, he doesn't fit in with those people, and I think that George Michael and I are gonna be closer than ever. He's gonna need a father... still needs a father. The only mother figure he's ever had in his life was...
Gob: Oh, it was Mom.
Michael: Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. Huh, poor kid.
Gob: I can't imagine.
Michael: Nor can I.
Gob: Wait, we had Mom.
Michael: You know, in a way, she was our mom.