Jacob Quote #27
Quote from Jacob in Student Transfer
Raheem: What up, ol' curly head Arthur from PBS looking boy?
Jacob: And good morning to you, Raheem.
Gregory: You let them talk to you like that?
Jacob: Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but the boys and I are bonding in the tradition of playing the dozens. It's also called roasting. Also called, uh, blazing, frying. Hmm. Lot of cooking terminology.
Gregory: Look, man. I'm from Baltimore, okay? All I know is when somebody roasts you, you got to roast them back. Our teachers used to roast us. If they didn't, we wouldn't have respected them. You're just getting clowned.
Jacob: Of course I'm being clowned, okay? I don't know how to roast.
Gregory: It's not that hard. You just kind of have to take what people give you, like... You ol' mothball-sweater-vest looking boy.
Jacob: Hmm. Simple yet cutting.
Gregory: Mm-hmm.
Jacob: Okay. Thank you. I thought you had to bring way more to the table. In the Dean Martin celebrity roasts...
Abbott Elementary Quotes
‘Student Transfer’ Quotes
Quote from Barbara
Jacob: Barbara, have you ever been roasted by your students?
Barbara: One, they're five. Two, they respect me. Three, what would they even say?
Quote from Jacob
Jacob: Hey, I need to talk. Like to a friend. You know how sometimes when you're being chased by a dog and you can't tell if it's playing or if it's trying to bite you?
Gregory: No.
Jacob: But at the same time, you don't want to stop running, because if it isn't playing, you're gonna get bit? Look, I tried roasting my students back, and it didn't work. It got way worse and oddly specific.
Gregory: Come on. It couldn't have been that bad.
Jacob: They called me "HuffPo-reading gay Pete Buttigieg," which is repetitive and insulting. As if I would read a word of Huffington Post after Arianna stepped down.
Gregory: You may just have to take the L on this one, man. I mean, you can't really beat them at their own game. It's like them challenging you to... Dungeons & Dragons.
Jacob: Yeah, you can't really challenge someone to D&D. It's more like a cooperative game that's all about the shared experience rather than winning. [gasps, snaps fingers] Thank you, you ol' good friendship having man.
Quote from Ava
Janine: I feel that with a more challenging workload, Courtney will be much, much easier to handle, and she won't have time to distract her classmates.
Ava: Mm-hmm. Why does that sound so familiar? Oh. Hold up.
Melissa: [removes file] Part 3?
Ava: My bad, y'all. She was supposed to skip second grade, but they told me during Essence Fest. I missed a lot of paperwork during that month.
Janine: Isn't Essence Fest just a weekend?
Ava: Maybe for y'all.