Dick Quote #68

Quote from Dick in Dick, Smoker

Sally: Dick, you've been smoking those things since you got home. It's almost like they're addictive or something.
Dick: Don't be silly. If cigarettes were bad, they wouldn't sell them everywhere. Besides, I can quit whenever I want. There, you see, I've stopped. [puts out cigarette and pulls out a new one] There's nothing to it. [puts cigarette in mouth] You know, Sally, if you want to advance, you're going to have to open your mind to new experiences. [lights cigarette] Well, I've started again.

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 ‘Dick, Smoker’ Quotes

Quote from Sally

Sally: Oh, I'm ready to take responsibility. Believe me, I can handle responsibility. No problem. Tommy, I'm hereby placing you under house arrest.
Ms. Koppel: Well, I just thought counseling-
Sally: Your rations will be cut in half. You will report to calisthenics at 0500, sharp.
Tommy: Could I be placed in a foster home or something?
Sally: I'm his mother. I'll handle him.
Ms. Koppel: I thought you were his sister.
Sally: Sister, mother, whatever.
Tommy: I think you're actually my aunt.
Harry: In our family, it's kind of hard to tell.

Quote from Harry

Harry: Well, what are we supposed to do? Dick is always here.
Sally: Wait a minute. Of course. This is a test.
Tommy: What?
Harry: For the next 60 seconds, she's going to emit a high-pitched tone.

Quote from Dick

Nina: What do you think you're doing?
Dick: Smoking.
Nina: Please don't smoke in front of me. I just quit a year ago.
Dick: Oh, you poor, misguided girl. Don't you miss it? The first cool drag in the morning, a relaxing smoke on the roof on a warm summer night. And if I ever have sex, I think I'm going to smoke afterwards.
Nina: Have you ever read the warning on the side of the pack?
Dick: Well, I'm not a fetus.
Nina: Those things will take 10 years off your life.
Dick: Yes, but that's off the end of your life, and those years are crappy anyway.
Nina: Well, there happens to be a policy here. Cigarettes are only allowed in university-sanctioned smoking zones. Take it outside.
Dick: All right, if you're going to be a big fetus about it.